 konnichiwa~
Hello there & welcome to my blog. Here you'll read tidbits about my daily life, some random thoughts, & maybe a rant here and there. I'm sure you'll learn something about me, if you don't know me of course. Down below are links to find me (personal accounts not posted). I hope you enjoyed your stay while listening to the songs I'm recently listening to. Come back & read again~ ^w^/
find me:
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Dislike. Gratitude. Philosophy.
written on Monday, April 17, 2017 @ 11:38 PM ✈
I really hate how I turned out. Where did the me who studied hard back in school go? (Did I even study? haha) Or at least, where'd the me who would work so hard with so much positivity that first year in college go? I'm just slacking off so much. I don't want to work. I just want to enjoy. The thought of taking a semester off still jumps on me every now and then. Of course I don't think I should because it'll definitely put me behind... I just need to pick up the slack. Every start of the school year I say, Don't procrastinate. Stay on top of the ball. But it always comes down to this.
Will I survive this year? I guess we'll see...
Time is flying so fast. It's already finals.
I sorta broke down today. Just a little.
And I'm really grateful for everyone I could rely on. They're always encouraging me... they have so much faith in me (whether it's genuine or out of courtesy). Especially to Minar and Deilys (Adrian). They're the ones I rant to the most. Neither of them are art majors so they might not really understand what troubles me, but they do understand that I sure have a huge workload ^^; I also vented to Steph a bit today too. I don't really want to bother them-- or anyone else for that matter-- because I know everyone has their own problems to deal with. And they're not venting to anyone else. And I'd hate to have to add any more negativity than they are already holding.
I ranted to Arlene for the first time. I always rely on her support for classes and stuff, but this is the first time I actually couldn't help but tell her how stressed I was. Of course she was super supportive. I have a lot of respect for her, along with Flora, Celine, and everyone else who has the talent, the passion, and who are very warm. I probably mentioned this before, but they're the ones I don't want to disappoint. I worry about what they think; the nicer they are, the more I worry. I try not to overthink though; whatever attitude they show me, I just need to accept that it's the truth and I need to stop "putting words in their mouth," in this case, thoughts in their action? Head? If that makes sense... But it felt really good to finally tell someone who's been in my shoes.
Philosophy... well I was just thinking, my distractions come from me thinking about everything I like, from my $$$ collectibles and plush, to the many fandoms I'm in, to the things I want/couldn't get. If I didn't have those desires, I'd be so free... so free.
I'd be free, but not happy? I'd probably be neutrally happy. I mean, I'm living right? Instead of being happy about materialistic objects... how will I be if I didn't have them?
Well, I guess I have to break my habit of being hung up on things too... it takes a while, but I usually break them eventually...
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Dislike. Gratitude. Philosophy.
written on Monday, April 17, 2017 @ 11:38 PM ✈
I really hate how I turned out. Where did the me who studied hard back in school go? (Did I even study? haha) Or at least, where'd the me who would work so hard with so much positivity that first year in college go? I'm just slacking off so much. I don't want to work. I just want to enjoy. The thought of taking a semester off still jumps on me every now and then. Of course I don't think I should because it'll definitely put me behind... I just need to pick up the slack. Every start of the school year I say, Don't procrastinate. Stay on top of the ball. But it always comes down to this.
Will I survive this year? I guess we'll see...
Time is flying so fast. It's already finals.
I sorta broke down today. Just a little.
And I'm really grateful for everyone I could rely on. They're always encouraging me... they have so much faith in me (whether it's genuine or out of courtesy). Especially to Minar and Deilys (Adrian). They're the ones I rant to the most. Neither of them are art majors so they might not really understand what troubles me, but they do understand that I sure have a huge workload ^^; I also vented to Steph a bit today too. I don't really want to bother them-- or anyone else for that matter-- because I know everyone has their own problems to deal with. And they're not venting to anyone else. And I'd hate to have to add any more negativity than they are already holding.
I ranted to Arlene for the first time. I always rely on her support for classes and stuff, but this is the first time I actually couldn't help but tell her how stressed I was. Of course she was super supportive. I have a lot of respect for her, along with Flora, Celine, and everyone else who has the talent, the passion, and who are very warm. I probably mentioned this before, but they're the ones I don't want to disappoint. I worry about what they think; the nicer they are, the more I worry. I try not to overthink though; whatever attitude they show me, I just need to accept that it's the truth and I need to stop "putting words in their mouth," in this case, thoughts in their action? Head? If that makes sense... But it felt really good to finally tell someone who's been in my shoes.
Philosophy... well I was just thinking, my distractions come from me thinking about everything I like, from my $$$ collectibles and plush, to the many fandoms I'm in, to the things I want/couldn't get. If I didn't have those desires, I'd be so free... so free.
I'd be free, but not happy? I'd probably be neutrally happy. I mean, I'm living right? Instead of being happy about materialistic objects... how will I be if I didn't have them?
Well, I guess I have to break my habit of being hung up on things too... it takes a while, but I usually break them eventually...
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we live under the same sky
“To put away aimlessness and weakness, and to begin to think with purpose, is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment; who make all conditions serve them, and who think strongly, attempt fearlessly, and accomplish masterfully.”
- James Allen Quotes
Sometimes I wonder how people see me and what they think of me. It scares me a bit, honestly. I am sure though, that what they think of me,
what they think my life is, is a complete misperception. I have always tried to show myself as a carefree person, as someone who wont get bothered
because of public judgements. I am sure my friend and family think there is nothing going wrong in my life, that I do not worry enough, that
I am always happy. And I am sure they probably somewhat hate me for it because, lets admit it, there is nothing worse than seeing someone
whose life seems so perfect while yours is a complete mess. Truth is, I have become an expert at pretending. I think we are all experts
or at least we are getting there.
I kept the image on the left bc it was kawaii-ne~ & this above bc I really liked what the creator wrote ^^
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: afeeqah azhar, 19 march, malaysian .
: hidenobu suzuki, + follow