This morning I woke up crying. Probably because my dream-me was bawling, and I don't know why. Also because I woke up at 7:30am (by alarm) and Robin went to get groceries with his brother LOL

I was sneezing so much last night, like I had full-on allergies, with a stuffy nose. I ended up taking DayQuil pills (I prefer liquid Nyquil though lol) but it looks like it did the job, and I slept well. Woke up with no more stuff nose. I continued sneezing after blowing my nose though -.-

Anyway, yesterday we fixed up my desk setup (well, he did since he didn't like how "cluttered" my setup was), and so, I'm switching over to Windows. At least just my art stuff. I don't want to part with my Macbook since it literally has everything on there lol it took a few hours to get my Clip Studio Paint settings uploaded to cloud and restored to the PC CSP. I have to make adjustments. I'm trying to recreate the CSP layout as close to the Mac version as possible, but I couldn't even get my brushes from my hard drive because Windows can't read the Mac-formatted drive. Which is where the unnecessary frustration comes from.

I was SOO annoyed with it because I swear I could read the drive before... so in order to use the drive with the PC, I need to reformat it. WHICH MEANS. I need to transfer all my files to another drive. We have a 2TB drive, which is taking forever to move to another storage. AND THEN. I gotta wait for everything to transfer from my 4TB (~2TB worth of stuff) to the 2TB drive.
*So I thought you gotta pay for Paragon for Windows, but you can actually download Paragon for free from Seagate. I downloaded it because I have a good feeling that it would work, and was getting happy that I would not need to format my drive, but he said not to trust software, don't download extra software etc etc etc *rolls eyes*
Fine. We'll do it the long way then.

It's not even a big problem, so I don't even know why I was extremely pissed at the whole situation.

 BT21 released a new playlist called "Rainy Garden ASMR." Just what I needed after a stressful day yesterday.

Currently typing on the stairs in the new apartment because I'm tired of sitting at my desk (unsurprisingly messy). Yesterday I finally started to do some work for that project I joined. Guess what? I low-key regret signing that contract and working with them. They're good people, don't get me wrong but the communication, the workflow... it's just not working for me. Ie. the character designs were no longer the final designs (this is a huge problem because how do you expect storyboard artists to do their work?) I can still work through it until the end of my contract though, so I will definitely be fine. 

I did some storyboarding. This really stressed me out. It's been so long since I've storyboarded, and I'm definitely not cut out to be a storyboard artist hah. 
--gah! there's an annoying fly--
The shot list was a mess... I had to go back and forth between the shot list and the script. Giving me a headache.. and I ended up doing some thumbs. Since we technically don't have character designs anymore, the substitute characters were generic. And I guess this works for a small production, but at this rate, we won't even be able to start animation until the end of my contract 🙃

I spent 4 hours. FOUR goddang hours on the thumbs. Unpaid PFT. I'm trying to limit only working 1-2 hours on this project. ~and that's what I did this morning~ I'm also giving myself a lot of pressure to produce "perfect" work, again, but 1) I'm not working with professionals, 2) I'm definitely not being paid enough for perfect to extra work, and 3) it's a small project that probably won't be on my resume ultimately.

So after that unnecessary stress, we went to IKEA to get Robin a desk. I was already feeling pretty bummed and tired, and then going to IKEA was actually stressful too. There was some fun to it, but he was annoyed/frustrated with something else as well. And it felt like he just wanted to get the table and go. Afterwards, I was texting with Jobee and she was spilling a lot of deets that added to my existing stress. I mean, I told her to tell me anyway. Stuff just weighed on me. It is a really bad idea to let negative thoughts + overthinking ferment in your mind. It's sooo heavy. But it was also something I didn't and couldn't get myself to talk about. I just want to be selfish... but then I'll just feel guilty.

From Jo last night, non-verbatim: stop trying to please others, please yourself // "REMEMBER this JOHN LOCKE or SOME HOBBES DUDE. ONCE SAID ALL HUMANS ARE BORN INNATELY SELFISH."-- had to quote her on this because it's funny.

I still have to call Dad and tell him we moved. Ahh I hate dealing with this, but in the long run, everything should be better... hopefully... Well, what can I do? We all grow up...

 It's been so long since I've updated. And mostly because it was too much work moving my Huion out of the way and bringing down my laptop from the glass stand.

As the title suggests, we've moved! Robin and I moved everything that was ours to the new place. On Saturday, we'll be moving his brother and the rest of the stuff over here, as well as going back to Stockton to pick up some stuff. I spent most of this morning cleaning because things were dusty, plus the windows were open so there was a lot of ash on the sills. It feels soo nice to finally have our own kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom.

This still isn't the kind of studio I had in mind, but with him who likes to be able to "leave at a moment's notice," I can't really decorate it the way I want. Especially with his mindset of wanting to buy a cheaper house somewhere else. So, everything right now is temporary. Moving was a hassle but still better than when I moved from my old apartments ahahhaa. I've left most of my stuff at home, sadly.

--

I've also taken some steps forward with my business! There's still a long ways to go, but I'm happy with the progress I've been making. It's been tough keeping myself motivated, so that's why I watch a lot of studio vlogs! Heh.

Also, since there's more room now, maybe I'll learn some dances? hehe

 This morning I woke up crying. Probably because my dream-me was bawling, and I don't know why. Also because I woke up at 7:30am (by alarm) and Robin went to get groceries with his brother LOL

I was sneezing so much last night, like I had full-on allergies, with a stuffy nose. I ended up taking DayQuil pills (I prefer liquid Nyquil though lol) but it looks like it did the job, and I slept well. Woke up with no more stuff nose. I continued sneezing after blowing my nose though -.-

Anyway, yesterday we fixed up my desk setup (well, he did since he didn't like how "cluttered" my setup was), and so, I'm switching over to Windows. At least just my art stuff. I don't want to part with my Macbook since it literally has everything on there lol it took a few hours to get my Clip Studio Paint settings uploaded to cloud and restored to the PC CSP. I have to make adjustments. I'm trying to recreate the CSP layout as close to the Mac version as possible, but I couldn't even get my brushes from my hard drive because Windows can't read the Mac-formatted drive. Which is where the unnecessary frustration comes from.

I was SOO annoyed with it because I swear I could read the drive before... so in order to use the drive with the PC, I need to reformat it. WHICH MEANS. I need to transfer all my files to another drive. We have a 2TB drive, which is taking forever to move to another storage. AND THEN. I gotta wait for everything to transfer from my 4TB (~2TB worth of stuff) to the 2TB drive.
*So I thought you gotta pay for Paragon for Windows, but you can actually download Paragon for free from Seagate. I downloaded it because I have a good feeling that it would work, and was getting happy that I would not need to format my drive, but he said not to trust software, don't download extra software etc etc etc *rolls eyes*
Fine. We'll do it the long way then.

It's not even a big problem, so I don't even know why I was extremely pissed at the whole situation.

 BT21 released a new playlist called "Rainy Garden ASMR." Just what I needed after a stressful day yesterday.

Currently typing on the stairs in the new apartment because I'm tired of sitting at my desk (unsurprisingly messy). Yesterday I finally started to do some work for that project I joined. Guess what? I low-key regret signing that contract and working with them. They're good people, don't get me wrong but the communication, the workflow... it's just not working for me. Ie. the character designs were no longer the final designs (this is a huge problem because how do you expect storyboard artists to do their work?) I can still work through it until the end of my contract though, so I will definitely be fine. 

I did some storyboarding. This really stressed me out. It's been so long since I've storyboarded, and I'm definitely not cut out to be a storyboard artist hah. 
--gah! there's an annoying fly--
The shot list was a mess... I had to go back and forth between the shot list and the script. Giving me a headache.. and I ended up doing some thumbs. Since we technically don't have character designs anymore, the substitute characters were generic. And I guess this works for a small production, but at this rate, we won't even be able to start animation until the end of my contract 🙃

I spent 4 hours. FOUR goddang hours on the thumbs. Unpaid PFT. I'm trying to limit only working 1-2 hours on this project. ~and that's what I did this morning~ I'm also giving myself a lot of pressure to produce "perfect" work, again, but 1) I'm not working with professionals, 2) I'm definitely not being paid enough for perfect to extra work, and 3) it's a small project that probably won't be on my resume ultimately.

So after that unnecessary stress, we went to IKEA to get Robin a desk. I was already feeling pretty bummed and tired, and then going to IKEA was actually stressful too. There was some fun to it, but he was annoyed/frustrated with something else as well. And it felt like he just wanted to get the table and go. Afterwards, I was texting with Jobee and she was spilling a lot of deets that added to my existing stress. I mean, I told her to tell me anyway. Stuff just weighed on me. It is a really bad idea to let negative thoughts + overthinking ferment in your mind. It's sooo heavy. But it was also something I didn't and couldn't get myself to talk about. I just want to be selfish... but then I'll just feel guilty.

From Jo last night, non-verbatim: stop trying to please others, please yourself // "REMEMBER this JOHN LOCKE or SOME HOBBES DUDE. ONCE SAID ALL HUMANS ARE BORN INNATELY SELFISH."-- had to quote her on this because it's funny.

I still have to call Dad and tell him we moved. Ahh I hate dealing with this, but in the long run, everything should be better... hopefully... Well, what can I do? We all grow up...

 It's been so long since I've updated. And mostly because it was too much work moving my Huion out of the way and bringing down my laptop from the glass stand.

As the title suggests, we've moved! Robin and I moved everything that was ours to the new place. On Saturday, we'll be moving his brother and the rest of the stuff over here, as well as going back to Stockton to pick up some stuff. I spent most of this morning cleaning because things were dusty, plus the windows were open so there was a lot of ash on the sills. It feels soo nice to finally have our own kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom.

This still isn't the kind of studio I had in mind, but with him who likes to be able to "leave at a moment's notice," I can't really decorate it the way I want. Especially with his mindset of wanting to buy a cheaper house somewhere else. So, everything right now is temporary. Moving was a hassle but still better than when I moved from my old apartments ahahhaa. I've left most of my stuff at home, sadly.

--

I've also taken some steps forward with my business! There's still a long ways to go, but I'm happy with the progress I've been making. It's been tough keeping myself motivated, so that's why I watch a lot of studio vlogs! Heh.

Also, since there's more room now, maybe I'll learn some dances? hehe