HOME | ABOUT | ARCHIVE

Hello there & welcome to my blog. Here you'll read tidbits about my daily life, some random thoughts, & maybe a rant here and there. I'm sure you'll learn something about me, if you don't know me of course. Down below are links to find me (personal accounts not posted). I hope you enjoyed your stay while listening to the songs I'm recently listening to. Come back & read again~ ^w^/

store instagram | shop
ART: dA | tumblr | twitter | instagram

Coach picked me up for EHS grad in the morning. It went by pretty fast, only about an hour and a half. Me and Coach quickly looked for people to take pics. We got almost everyone, just missed Sarah. I thought it was going to be awkward w/ Lee since I just gave him the letter yesterday. It's a 50/50 chance he read it already. We were in a hurry w/ all the pics so we just switched photographers quickly (me & coach LOL). I was getting awk. & kinda just left, like panicked & forgot to say bye *shrugs*). He said bye to Coach, then 1.5 sec later he says bye to me. I turned around awkwardly, trying not to be but of course probably failed, & gave him a small wave. He hesitated saying that bye, I think. 

Coach stayed at our house for a bit bc she didn't want to go yet. We talked about a bunch of random stuff. Remember saying that if anyone came into our room, I gotta remember to hide his "purse" keychain (the messed up one w/ his name)? Well I kinda forgot, & Coach comes into the room. I give Jim the look, back & forth b/t Pikachu & her. She finally got it and slowly hid the keychain under her. I was sleeping on the inside of the bed. Jim got up to use the restroom... and accidentally pulls the keychain w/ her. It was a slow-mo moment where I see Coach see it and Coach watches me pull the keychain away. She exclaims! and now she knows. She said she can't believe my taste, and she asked me what part of him I like. I was like iunno! xD She can't tell that I liked him, but she keeps thinking he's interested in me lol She keeps asking me to consider her brother but uhm, no. Sorry xP

Later we went to Tong's BBQ at his brother-in-law's place, after going to Walgreen to buy stuff. The cashier was pretty cute & funny lol.
At the BBQ, we didn't do much at first. His sister made this cookie ice cream sandwich cake *o* It was yummy~ She made the big cookies~
Afterward, Jen comes. Alin comes way later. We played pool while at the same time playing charades. Tong was getting drunk haha. They let me try a wine cooler. It wasn't even that bad, tasted like Ramune. Brandan & Connie were surprised at me drinking lol Tong was getting so drunk though lol. They kept saying I was drunk -3- I was fiiiineeee :p
It was getting late, like 11 something so we went inside to watch a movie. Tong offered Jim red wine, & I tried some. It wasn't that bad. We were going to watch "Annabelle." I asked for pillows & drunk Tong passed me all 3 pillows xD After we said happy bday to him at 12am (bc his actual bday was the 31st), we were going to leave. We watched a lil bit of Annabelle. I was whispering to Jim about leaving and then I saw him looking over. I looked back, thinking he had something to say to me. He says, & points at me: "Stop staring." LOL I shrunk away into the couch next to Jim. We just all died ahaha I wasn't even staring psh xD
He said thanks to us & that if we needed to go, just go. After a while, we said we were going to go. Jim was about to get up & puts the pillow on Tong. Tong says "you can't leave yet" and kinda swings the pillow back on Jim's head, and she sits back down. LOL The funny thing is, he says we can go anytime, but didn't let Jim go xDD We still left after. He is so drunk haha.

What a long day~

This week I was so busy, including 2 graduations.

Mon (5/25), me & Jo went ice skating w/ Jessica, Cheng, Jay, and Wang. The guys didn't know how to ice skate lol so Jo took Wang and I was w/ the others. Jessica took a while to remember how to skate. Cheng's pretty good :3 But Jay, he didn't want to learn xD so he took a few steps along the wall, but ended up sitting out. After an hour-ish, we left to eat Mexican food. We walked :p
But nothing happeneddddd >x< Then we hung out at the park, prank called people. Prank called Meimei hahaha
~
I graduated this Tuesday, May 26, at Delta's Atherton Auditorium. That morning we had grad. rehearsal, then later that night, our official ceremony took place at 6pm. It was pretty quick, only an hour, but it felt long. Sorry to say, but I was falling asleep xDD had to tell Meimei to shake me awake lol In my head I'm just thinking that would be embarrassing to get caught falling asleep during the "important day of my teen life" lol And then after grad, quick pics, but it was pretty rushed. Most of the pictures w/ were random people I passed by xD mostly guys LOL. The only girl pics I had were w/ POLARIS, too bad Minar left too fast :p Apparently Robin was going to ask me for a pic, but I was busy taking family pics. Weird thing was Uncle Alan, Andrew's dad, came to help us take me & my sisters' group photo xD so awk haha. After I took a pic w/ Adrian, my dad told me to take a pic w/ Andrew but it was awk for me to ask him to take a pic w/ me. I was about to go, but then I saw his dad walking toward us already, and he called Andrew over. (Bc my dad, as loud as he is, "commanded," in a way, for his son to come take a pic w/ me. When we were taking pics, he mumbled to me about us being the 2 badminton players LOL. And then my pic w/ John, I wanted to take a pic w/ Rachel bc she was sho cute~ But I was in a hurry... Right after, I rushed to banquet (bc banquet was on the same day ToT) Jim called Axl/Coach to make sure they stayed (really, she only wanted Lee to stay LOL). I got there & some of them stayed, mostly the returners & seniors. They congratulated me & bombarded me w/ hugs, then we took pics & everyone hurriedly left. Love them so much; sorry for making them wait ^^' When I got in, I heard Lee call my name, but everyone was surrounding me, hugging me & congratulating me, all I was able to do was a quick look in his direction, don't even think there was eye contact :p After the group pics, & anyone else who wanted to take pics w/ me, Nanette & Nicole "helped" me to take a pic w/ him, but too bad their phone cam quality were not that good >3<
Afterward, it was only the Jose twins, me, Coach, & Mai. After we left, we chatted for a while w/ Jen Jim & Jo. Lee just left, and we watched his truck leaving. He turned toward us & Coach said bye so he waved & we waved back. Mai said "Coach you can't wave to him!" She turns to me, "oh but you can" Then Coach whiningly says "Why~" and Mai answers "because they're dating." *insert Coach's surprised exclamation of what* "well, not yet. but they're going to." And then there's me dying of laughter & embarrassment, telling Mai to stop and telling Coach not to believe her. My sisters were in the car dying of laughter. After that we went out separate ways. Omgee Mai is killing me xD
When I got home, I changed shoes & me, Jen, & Jim met Nancy & Alin at Chili's. We had dinner there (saw Eli too xD). After dinner, finally got homeee~ and then showed Mom pics of grad & Angela & Jessie & Andrew xD
~
Wed (5/27), I was supposed to go bowling but change of plans bc someone wanted to hang w/ Sai but he had work. So they moved it to Thur. (so I had to go bowling, instead of spending Jessica's bday w/ her >o<)
~
Thurs (5/28), went back to school for senior breakfast, diplomas, & signing yearbooks. Good day, good day ^^ Gave Jessica her presents~ (I did her dango last minute last night, and I went to sleep at 2-3am. Just glad it came out a lot better than the first one) Then I got senior photos from Steph & Jess. I hurriedly got my yearbook signed by people. Eh, I asked Grant to sign my yearbook, but I thought it might be awkward after I rejected him, but he left me a nice note ^^ and then... there was Victor's message: Too many words, too little space. Dayum, I'm gonna miss him so much haha. We had pancakes & egg & sausage. I was really reluctant to sign my yearbooks then bc it was gonna get dirtied ToT but no choice :p At the end we had to go over to the college career center for a short assembly kind of thing. I got Roberto and Stripes to sign before we left. Sorry to hold them back hahaha. Steph wanted a pic w/ him but nooo she didn't go for it. xD
At the assembly, Mr Thom explained to us about a challenge coin thingy that originated as some kind of identification in the military. And that at the end of our mission at SECA, the school had ordered each one of us a coin, it was presented to us as the mission is completed aka attending a 4year university/college, handed out by ranking. It was really cool~ Seriously, SECA is the best~ <3
Afterward, we could just lounge around, sign yearbooks, turn in gowns & get our diplomas. I got more people to sign my yearbook. After a while, as the line shortened we got in line too. Stripes happened to be in line. For Steph, who wanted a senior photo from him but didn't think he'd give her one/it was awk, I DM-ed him on Twitter even though we were standing behind him. LOL. I put my phone away. Seconds later, he turns around, and says "what?" in that breathy way of his lol and I put out my hand and said jokingly "where's my picture? your senior portrait~" (I cannot believe I did that LOL I didn't mean to sound demanding hehe) Then he was like "you want one?" and I was like yeah~ then started joking around about him getting famous & selling his photo & autograph (I made him sign it hehe) Then Steph, who was with me, chips in saying she wants one too. (Me & Steph had the same taste; we chose the same photo & took the last 2 ahaha I just didn't like the ones in the gown xD) Eventually people who passed by like Jessie & Carrie & Angela & Bea LOL started sounding offended bc he didn't give them one xD Whoops, sorry for the trouble Stripes bahaha. His "CEO pose" were more popular, too bad me & Steph took the last ones haha. Turned in our gowns & got our diploma~ it looks so nice~
When school got out, I went to Ms. West's to get my yearbook signed & for extra autograph sheets (which she didn't ask for me to pay for) & Steph got her pic w/ Stripes thanks to Angela's obvious ways ahaha. Then I went to get Mr. Thom's sign but he took forever bc as he was writing, he was chit-chatting w/ people :p Finally got home, I quickly finished up my letters to Mary, Vito & Lee, since I was going to see them to go bowling. As I was writing my letters, Lee texted me, since I had to go pick him up. He was being weird, as always, but in one text, slightly weirder lol.

We went to pick him up, and he texted me, making me feel like we got to the wrong house xD He chatted w/ us in the car, & yup, he forgot about that "Love comes in many forms" convo ToT I told him he talked to me in the beginning of junior year, but stopped talking to me afterward. He said, "well that sucks" lol. We got to West Lane bowl, but waited in the van bc Mary & them weren't here yet. I asked him to sign my yearbook --extra sheets-- & he chose the orange pen (he likes orange bc it's the color of the sunset LOL) He was about to write then said he forgot everything haha. (He lied to meee, he said he couldn't write cursive during season, but at that moment said he only wrote in cursive > > I cannot trust him :p )
We saw Christian & Stella (their class prez) arrive so we got outta the car & walked w/ them inside. Ivy was sitting inside alone LOL. When everyone was finally here, the guys got a lane & played first. Then the girls got a lane for themselves. & me, Adrian, Ivy, Jeremy/Joyce, & Mai got a lane later, but far from the rest bc, stupid cashier > > After bowling, we went to Wingstop & then to the park. Even though we didn't get to be near each other at the bowling alley or Wingstop, I'm just glad he got to hang out & have fun w/ everyone else :) That's all that matters. Before Adrian left, I asked him to sign my yearbook. I didn't think he had much to write to me, but what he wrote was really touching <3
We got to Unity Park, and it was kinda awk bc I was the only one not from their squad & stuff. Alex, Adrian's cousin by marriage, was the only one who formally introduced himself to me. We watched Vito & Lee try tennis for the first time. It was funny. Mary's really good at it haha. Then we went to play basketball. It was okay, but I felt like the others were awk playing w/ me. I felt awk playing w/ them. Afterward, they all stopped playing and we just went back into the tennis court cage. I was messaging Meimei & they said they could stop by~ TwT Kinda glad they came to get me, but I felt guilty that I was on my phone & w/ them instead of who I was supposed to hang out with. To be honest, it was almost suffocating bc of the pressure of being w/ their squad... I introduced the groups, well only to Lee, Vito, & Mary bc out of everybody, they're the ones I really know. I could've introduced the others since I knew their names :p but that's weird haha. Lee & Mary said their names & greeted them-ish, psh, rude Vito lol. Even though I invited them to play volleyball w/ us, since Sam brought one, they didn't join us, I mean, it would've been completely awk for them. I went to play volleyball w/ them bc, I mean, I can't just send them back after they delivered me water. Lee, Vito, Mary & Marianne went to play some more basketball. If Mary was watching me, she'd notice that I was a lot more happier playing volleyball w/ them then when I was hanging out w/ their squad. I didn't really mean anything, but it's kinda expected right? So when they went home, Meimei and them said bye really loud to them. I saw Vito's arm stick out to wave lol. After that, I went back into the tennis court too and sat down on the floor next to the bench. Lee was doing soccer tricks w/ the basketball; forgetting it wasn't a soccer ball, he bounced it off his head, and it hurt lol. The ball rolled toward me & I bounced it back to him after he stopped rubbing his head xD It was getting pretty late, like 9pm, to the point where we can barely see the tennis ball. Lee went to play on the swings by himself (I had that thought before he did, but I didn't want to leave the group again) & it was funny watching him swing lol. The people who were playing basketball asked if they could play tennis against Sai. Vito let them, and Lee came back. I was cautious... and after 15min or so, they were done. Then we started to leave too. Before we got into the cars, I gave them the letters. Mary's friend took me home. They were really nice. I texted Mary when I got home, and she said she was "kinda sad that [I] was segregated from [them]" I didn't want to make her sad that I had more fun w/ my friends than w/ them (but technically, it was their friends + me... so it was difficult, esp. since I'm not that outgoing type)
Even though I didn't get to hang out w/ more of the badminton family, it was fine for me to just be in their presence & just watching them. That was good enough. ❤️
~
Fri (5/29), we were just at home & went to Costco for pics... I don't remember what else. I remembered I stayed up all night to finish Ivy's panda keychain & write the letters to her & Adrian. I slept at 4am and had to wake up early for their grad. I was surprised for having so much to write to Adrian, but I mean, I was touched by his message, too. 

Seriously, I got out of school, but this week, I got even less sleep then when I was in school. O-O

It was weird today. There were pretty much no classes for us. So a bunch of us were just in the college career center. I was writing Meimei's name in script in her yearbook, & I was also tweeting Grant (we had a misunderstanding & just started talking).
At some point, I went out w/ Jessica to use the restroom. On the way, we saw LeAnn & Steph pushing the books back into the book room. The key wouldn't work, & then John came along & managed to open it hehe. I was still DM-ing Grant, but the convo was taking some weird turning points, & I was showing Steph. She said we've been talking a lot.. well interacting. And I was like... we are? I guess we are.

We walked back to the room, & I continued to work on Meimei's name. And then he, who was literally sitting at the table next us, confessed to me. Well, he just said that he's had a crush on me like last month or something. It kinda shocked me, & I really didn't know what to say. Uhm, it was awkward bc we were in the same room. Then, Orion & John, who were sitting w/ him, starting talking to me, & they pulled me in the convo, but I pretended to be working & only answered them. Gaaah. I really didn't know how to reject him... that's the first time someone actually said it straight out to me (unlike Robin, he didn't say it straight out, but he was late -3- )

*EDIT: apparently I forgot to mention how I answered him lol but I told him that I was just shocked, & then that's when he asked how I felt. Took me a while, but I knew I had to answer him, so I told him that I like some guy from another school.

But he's a really nice guy, so I hope he finds his other half :)

Day after sections, hiked. Met Qi's BF uh.. impression was meh. Finally made it up there. Tong is my brother now~~ LOL

Linda fell on our last stretch back.

After hike, eat it all back at a Thai restaurant called Mango Garden. Our waiter was a player~ lol not that cute, but not bad looking either.

Finally it's section time > < Skipping school haaaah. Mai & Mary came to pick me up~
So the first game was vs. a Davis high girl. She was really nice & funny. Had a cool coach too. I lost to her so I played in the losers' bracket. I won my next 2 games but in the end I lost to St. Mary's, which was really annoying. We split too. I'm sorry guys ToT

After I changed, we were going to meet up w/ Lee & Vito for lunch. Mary started Facebook messaging w/ them two. Vito taking long time to reply, and I guess Lee wasn't replying to Coach, so she told us to text Lee. Mary doesn't have his number, and she asked me if I had it & I said yeah. Mai said "you would have it." They were teasing me about "getting all the guys" after I was telling them about Victor texting me, asking if I was ok. (He was worried I was sick or something happened and he texted me at 10, on break from the AP test xD silly guy) I told them about other stuff about him, how we first chatted, and how I tell him lots of stuff & I didn't give a name, just said he, & Mary was like don't say friend, just say boyfriend. and I was like "Nooo, he's like my brother."
So when Mai said I was getting all the guys she continued, "Yeah, like Lee" & then they're all like "oh yeahhh!" & coach says "he doesn't talk to girls" & Mary says, "yeah. he talks to me, but only a lil' bit" & i say he doesn't even talk to me that much, but it's not like they were listening to me LOL

We went to Hobby Lobby because Coach was looking for some grad gifts. I was still texting Lee. Then Mary added me to the FB group message because her phone was dying. I read the previous messages & she had told him to reply to me. And then followed up w/ "your gf hahaha" & he says "I don't have a GF" & then asks where's vito xD after quite a long time debating, we finally told them the Habit, & waited for them to get there. When he said they'll get there soon, I told coach & we were gonna get there b4 they do. Axl bought an aux cord at Hobby Lobby. We got to the car before Axl, and Coach left him. We thought she was joking, but she really went out of the parking lot, down to the next plaza, but of course, she went back to pick him up. When he tried to get in, Coach moved the car forward. He went along, told her to keep going, & hopped into the car as it moved. Poor Axl!
We got to the In-n-Out plaza to wait for them. We waited by the car. I texted him where they were at. He said 8 min. After 8 min. passed I asked if they were here yet, and he said yeah. Then we saw his car. He came out of the car & I don't know why but I had a moment, that anime moment LOL. I was just shocked. In a good way. After that initial few seconds, I was like why did I have that moment LOL. I don't even know! He didn't look that much special/different, Must be 'cause I didn't see him for 2 days LOL (but can't be... lol) Probably 'cause he wasn't in a regular t-shirt baahhaha. So Coach (or was it Lee?) asked where we were going to eat, because Lee said he was hungry, even though Vito said he wasn't hungry. I said "I'm hungryyy~" in a whiny way lol. Afterward we chose the habit, well Vito chose it lol.

Lee does walk slow haha I ended up walking slightly in front of him because everyone was ahead of us. As we neared the habit, Mai/Mary walked in (and we were getting bunched up at the door) I held the door for them. At first, Lee would've went in but he stopped. I looked at him. He didn't go. Vito, who was standing next to Lee, had that Tsk, you two weirdos kind of look at us& walked in. So me & Lee were at the door, "arguing" who should go first. LOL. We were like telling each other to go. It wasn't going anywhere so I went haha. We stood by the trash can by the door lol. When I moved closer to the customer waiting seats, he went and sat next to Coach, and we were just all talking about what to eat and stuff.
I ordered food for them. They went to find a seat first. So when me and Coach joined them, this was the seating arrangement: Coach, Mary, Vito, Lee (in front of the window); Mai, Axl, me (across from them on chairs), so I sat across from Lee. I had no choiceeee lol. Technically I served them :p I felt like I had to, I don't know why xD I guess they had a kid's aura lol. 
When the food came, Mary moved Coach's seat to next to Lee, so Coach sat in front of me -3-
Vito & Lee eat so messily! xD I was comparing me & Mary's muscle b/t the thumb & index finger (the web) back during the car ride. & she wanted to see Vito's & Lee's. Vito didn't have an obvious one. & even though we said it was his racket hand, he said "Lee does everything" lolol.
Then Vito started asking Lee about his life, kinda. & I told Coach in Chinese, known him for 4 years & now you ask about his family? xD (When I told my sisters this they said, known him for 4 years & still don't know where he lives? LOL) He also asked him when he was leaving for Iowa. He said after he gets his diploma (He lieeee. He told me he won't be leaving right after ToT) & he was talking to Coach, he said he's coming back in 2 years (I wasn't listening to their convo though). Coach said he's going to Iowa to get married; he said he's not gonna get married that early. Coach asked me something about his 2 years, like what is his reason. I don't even know what she's asking LOL. So i was so lost, & I told her that I don't understand & Lee, who was of course listening, just laughed. We just sat & talked. Vito saw Mai's Stagg-talking-to-boyfriend & then everything went awkward lol. Coach went to say hi. When she came back she said let's play truth or dare & I was like nooo i'm not playing that (too risky LOL) & then she sat down & told Axl to go say hi. He did. I turned around to watch, & was talking to coach. In mid-sentence I turned to face Coach, but she disappeared on me! So I was talking to nobody & Lee watched (or was watching) me, & I was like "Heh? Where's coach? how can she leave me like that when I'm talking to her xD" I don't remember if he gave a response or not lol
Coach brought him to introduce us I don't even know whyyyy it was so awkwarddd LOLOL
Coach had peppers/jalapenos & wanted to play a game so loser will eat it. She played against Mary & Mary lost. They played again & she lost again lol. Then Coach wanted to play Lee, but Lee said he sucked at rock-paper-scissors & wouldn't play. He told Coach to play me, but I was like "nuuuu I can't handle spicy." xD
(Near the end, this one time I saw Lee watching me (I wouldn't say staring) chew on my straw. & I was thinking Is it weird that i'm chewing the straw? lol Also, when Coach was talking to Vito, w/ Lee in between them, and when everyone else was talking, I was just thinking to myself, huh, he doesn't talk much.)

We walked to Bon Mange for desert. Axl and I got them snowflake & macarons. Axl & Vito were playing chess (smart ppl) & we played jenga (dumb ppl) (according to Coach ahaha) LOL Afterward we played card games together. One was "blanket" (I guess, is the translation). It was so funny because Lee & Axl had the slowest reaction xD Then we played like heads up & charades. Lee didn't want to play because he said he sucked at them 'cause he didn't know anything. Mary said "ooh fairy tales" and he was like oh yeah, then said nevermind because he thought it was the anime LOL I guess we were all pretty tired afterward. We played for 2-3 hrs-ish. Lee was pretty quiet; on his phone.
We were waiting for Vito's ride so we sat on the comfy couch. Lee sat at one of the tables playing Clash of Clans. Axl fell asleep. Coach was talking to Vito about Emily & other stuff (that I will not mention here :p) & talking about how guys could possibly like Vito & talking about how gay people were prettier than straight people (most of the time). Then they talked about how Vito (& Lee?) care about their looks. Vito said he doesn't, but Lee does lol (liesss xD they probably both do haha) Then they were talking about how Lee looked better in short hair. & Vito agreed LOL Then Mai says my name out loud at this moment & I said "whaaat~" & Mary leans over & whispers something to Vito & I'm sure I heard my name LOL also she gave me eye contact, w/ that look lol Then Lee turned around & says "talking bout my long hair?" & we were like yeah etc.
I whispered to Coach if she was going to take me home. I think she heard Lee instead of me so she asked him if she had to take him home xD
Vito/Mary/Mai's ride was here so we were going to leave. I was like "uh do I wake Axl?" 'cause I thought their car was outside & Coach was just walking them out. Guessing not, I tapped Axl's knee. No response. I cautiously tapped Axl's shoulder & Lee called me. Idunno why, so that I would leave Axl? lol I turned around to him then turned back to Axl & at the same time, Axl popped up, which scared me a little lol. (Earlier, I was telling Coach how Axl was a light sleeper, but she said he's hard to wake xD)

On the ride home, Coach was going to drop off Lee first, but when we were on the overpass toward EHS, he said "we might as well drop off Justina first" so Coach did. xD We were gonna drop him off, but we were saying how he didn't want anyone to know where he lives. & I said, "he lives in a trash can" lol. After I took my stuff out of the trunk, I said bye to them, & Lee said bye to me + full name, as usual xD
On the way he also brought up the topic about grad tickets. Coach told him she was gnna get one for herself & me. Since they're getting 20 tickets, & he said no one's gonna go for him anyway(?, not a lot at least?) he said that he can get tickets for us. Coach said "ok, I'll tell Mary then." So the tickets are coming from him~ :3

~~
(Bc I'm lazy, here's a super quick, not-so-grammatically-correct summary of the night)
jen & jim come back. tell them the story. go to seoul tofu house for alin's grad dinner. brandan suddenly asks me if i liked anyone on the team. why so sudden xD. we were like shocked LOL. then he was like "well every year there's always a couple (at the end?)" and we were like "ahhh, yeah." I guess we were able to avoid answering that question LOL. later on, he said something about a bird & a cage; me & jim just gave each other a look. what a coincidence LOL

I hope I didn't leave anything out. Tomorrow's hiking! :D

After practice today, I was supposed to have this hangout w/ the team, but since Coach said she wanted to take me out so I cancelled with him. Lies. I was going to the Bay -.- She just wanted to take me out to eat. Coach! D:<

I think she called Mary & Lee but they were both sleeping xD She put Lee on speaker, and when he answered her that he was sleeping, a slight pause, and he said why but at that moment Coach hung up xD Right after she gets a text from him about calling him then hanging up lol funny. 
Coach ended up taking me out to eat w/ Coach Kate at the Habit. It was nice seeing her again. She lost a lot weight... We were at the Habit for a while. I was almost falling asleep. My bad :p It's just, I didn't have much to say, so I just listened.

I have been so tired this week, probably bc of long continuous practices & lack of sleep. I'm just really sore & I really hate having PE right before practice... I was just so out of it today.
When I was practicing w/ Axl, I think I was close to having a panic attack. Not really sure what it is, but it's like I couldn't breathe & I was stressing too much I guess? I was also very frustrated w/ myself. So I'm mad at myself to the point where I want to cry. You know that feeling? But I can't, of course. I don't even understand why myself. I just couldn't catch up w/ Axl's serves, and I was breathing really hard. And I mean really hard. Not even the regularly-breathing-trying-to-catch-a-breath breathing. I was struggling to even get any air inside me, like I had asthma. And there's this tight-knot in the back of my throat; it happens when holding back too much. I calmed myself when I had to practice my serves. When I was doing footwork or serves, I kept thinking about this "panic attack" and what I'm stressing over.

When practice was over, I felt better. Then me & Axl played Mary/John Jay. Apparently they had a winning streak of 6-0. We broke that streak LOL. It was a split though. So now their score is 6-2 ahaha they wanted a rematch & this time me & Axl won w/o a split. xD It was fun. Then Mary asked her friend if I could have some chow mein (bc I was really hungry). So me & Aizle had some chow mein in a cup! ahaha since there were no plates.

Then I asked Mary about the hangout. She didn't know about it....? 'cause I asked her about it then she asked Vito about it. Vito said he said Thursday but I told him that we cancelled & moved to next Friday. I'm thinking in my head hasn't he told them yet? then how the heck did he answer me 'about 10 people' are going bowling? LOL was I not supposed to have told them yet? xD I was just asking Mary what they would prefer to eat for dinner :p Then she said something about starting a FB chat for us, but I don't even know who us is TuT
but I liked planning w/ him.... lol

Me & Coach got to the gym before EHS was let out of school. We were so suspicious LOL.
Had practice. Coach was tired so she told Lee to hit with me. I'm gonna miss his "perfect"s & "good shot"s ToT He was playing non-stop. I guess practice was okay.
At the end of open gym he asked me about the hangout on Thursday, but I just found out Coach wanted to take me out to Bay area so I told him I couldn't go that day (Mai was between us; he was by the bleachers & I was in front of the storage room. It sounded like we were talking about a "date" LOL and she gave me the look xD And she kept saying, "I knew there something. I called it." and kept teasing me haha.) When almost everyone left except for a few still cleaning up, he asked me why I couldn't go. I was talking to him as I walked to him. He said "well, now I have to tell them we cancelled" xD I said, "next week~" and he was like "next week?" in that exasperated tone of his. lol

Went home. I weighed 122.9! LOL. Probably 'cause I didn't eat much. After the AP US Gov. exam, I only had that school lunch-fake peanut butter-w/ jelly sandwich. And at home I had a corn dog. I was so hungry during practice. Then I gained it all back at dinner LOL /dies.

So after I was done eating & whatnot, I messaged him & asked him if we could do next week. So we ended up discussing plans for the hangout day. This guy... he must really going to miss the team & playing badminton. He told me to find something to do but I told him I don't know. And he said he doesn't usually go out so he doesn't know. I was thinking about bowling after I asked what was something he wanted to do (bc Nancy & them always go bowling for hangout) and he said he wanted to go bowling once in his life but that it was expensive. He didn't even know there's bowling alleys in Stockton xD This kid... lol
After we got the bowling date figured out, he said he'll text me how many people are gonna go & then told me to text him when I figure out a place to eat at. And I tell him I don't have his number. He sends it to me and says "There"
I died the whole time talking to him. He's hilarious LOL.
So I guess us two are planning the hangout (I seriously hate planning... -3- ) & he's my connection to EHS ahahaha

~~
Coach talked on the phone during break at practice so I'm just waiting. And I'm watching everyone else hit. I'm just thinking, Everyone's here hitting for fun. Me? I'm over here stressin' out about sections & not really wanting to practice. At the same time, I'm trying to push myself so I don't disappoint... like I did last year. I should just keep in mind, I'm trying to keep Axl's job LOL

There was practice/open gym today. Lee messaged me asking if there was open gym, & after I told him there was, he said hurry up & get there bc everyone's waiting for me & Coach to open the gym; but then Coach ends up not going.
I had a 2 hour practice w/ Axl, & this was right after my 5K run. My muscles, esp front calves, easily tensed during practice, so it was hard to move; we went through the whole box of birdies, not just 6 or 12--the whole box. It was 5:30 when Axl said I was done. 30 more min of open gym. He played w/ XinSai against Mary/JohnJay. It was a funny game to watch. After that, he was done, & he packed up & left. Well, I thought he left, but he was outside & came back in. Then asked Axl if Coach was coming tomorrow & what time etc. And Axl's like "I don't know, where's Justina?" xD Then Lee turned to me to ask me what time, but I don't know either :p
I was so tired I was sitting next to the storage room, & he was standing on the corner. He was watching Axl play JohnJay I think. I just looked at him... bc this week is gonna be the last time I'll see him.

I messaged Coach for him, & when she replied, I let him know. Then I decided to ask about him moving to Iowa. I guess it's true. He really is moving after graduation. *sigh*
And then I tell him we need to hangout so I can get a pic w/ him too. And then he tells me he's a locked up bird. Sometimes, he could be poetic xD
And then we were planning a day we could go hangout. Eventually he asked if it was only us 2. And then the hangout turned into a team hangout lol. Not that I mind; I wouldn't know how to deal w/ it if it was only us 2 anyway... and then we talked about Coach, & he said she doesn't even care about us, & he's feeling neglected but that it was okay, he doesn't care anymore, just want to get banquet over with. And then he said, at least we'll get to eat at the banquet together [team]. I sent him a crying Pusheen & he asked when my grad was. I told him: same day & time as banquet. Then he said it was pointless going to the banquet when not everyone was going to be there. I told him I'd make it if I could; he just said "okay I guess." He sounded kinda mad that not everyone -ahem- only me - LOL could make it to banquet one last time. Aww, he must really love the team :3 He kept telling me to find a place for our Thur. "dinner" & I'm like I don't know whereeee. He told me to "just do it" & to "try my best." I gave him a tantrum Pusheen & he finally gave in, saying he'll ask the team keke. And he said we are going after open gym Thur. (once again, after I'm all sweaty & possibly big, dinner before sections -o- ) I just wanted to take pics in a regular outfit. Pics w/ the team is also sweaty face/hair & PE clothes oii. He ended the message / a bunny smiling sticker :3 It just doesn't seem like his style, but still cute hehe.

This whole convo seemed so close to a confession, yet so natural at the same time LOL.
I don't know... I've been thinking about the letter (if I'm really gonna write one) & it was just different ways of telling him w/o it really being a confession, but just to let him know. I doubt it'd make much difference anyway since he's moving to Iowa... I'm just glad to have been able to see him & hear him laugh so much today :'3

I was so sleepy after my shower, I took a nap. Didn't wake up 'til 11:30, even though I was suppose to be up by 9:30 -3- Gotta study for AP Gov tomorrow...

I've been preoccupied this weekend, bc badminton is now officially over. Well at least w/ everyone else. I still have practice for sections.
After last night, I just couldn't stop thinking about it.
Thinking about him, thinking about confessing, thinking about the last day that I'll really, possibly see them.

I seriously am gonna miss that smile of his... his voice, calling my name... & just seeing him. 

Damn, how deep did I get myself in this? 😂

Whoot! Skipped school! lol jkay. Went to Franklin for League after dropping off Jo at school. Got to Franklin a lil' late-ish. hehe
In summary, we left pretty late. Vito & Lee got 2nd place for boys' doubles & I got 3rd for girl's singles & made it to sections. 

When the games started & we were waiting, Coach wanted to talk to us. So we stood by the stairs. She was done I guess? and then I was just looking around at them. I caught Lee's eyes and he said "you got my back right?" Of course, after he called my name like always. I just nodded, I mean, I was occupied thinking about the games ahead. 

Eh.. I split my first 2 games which was annoying > > and I just barely beat the Franklin girl I lost to at the last game of the season. I waited for my game w/ Jasmine (from BC) for a long time. Lost to her & had to play the Franklin girl for 2nd & 3rd. I was pretty pissed playing her & I was frustrated w/ my own shots & missing them too. Ended up losing. I was so mad, 2nd set I was hella quiet. Even though they were cheering for me, even Coach said "shake it off" & she usually doesn't. Sorry Mai, 2 unicorns died that day.

Vito & Lee were doing okay. They were playing in the semi-finals I think and Lee popped his racket. HE ACTUALLY POPPED HIS RACKET. I was watching him, and he was looking at his racket, turned around to his court and showed his racket to them. Turned back to look at his racket. And I was watching him. He looked up and we shared eye contact. He came up the stairs, and since my stuff was by the stairs, I picked up my racket and switched rackets w/ him. I'm guessing he's used to my racket since he used it during Stagg tournament. Plus, he said the grip is almost like his own grip (thick). The game ended in a split. He & Vito comes up, and he's like "F*ing piece of sh*" xD Not in a mad way bc he was smiling. We were all watching the game & everyone noticed they don't communicate & they kept flicking. Axl told Lee that they had an option to drop & I said "yeah, stop flicking~" and Axl hella laughed and pointed to me like yup, she said it. xD They went to get their water. And after headed off to their game. I hi-5ed Vito and said communicate. Lee followed afterward. I gave him a hi-5 and said the same thing I said to Vito. His hi-5 was like 2 sec. longer than a regular hi-5, like hi-5 handshake that guys kinda do, except it wasn't like that..? Idunno. And he just chuckled a little and said "thank you." My thoughts were: so formal (thank you) & that was a longer hi-5 than usual. LOL They eventually won their game.
After their game, I had to play the Franklin girl in the loser's bracket, so I took my racket. I think they went to play after me, so when I got back, he and Vito were already playing, & he ended up using Jaime's racket.
I was done w/ my matches by then. I was so sweaty. I changed my shoes, took off my rubber band & my hair had that bump after tying your hair up for so long & tight, I had to loosen it and shake it out. I headed out to the restroom to fix up my hair. I swear, I looked like I just washed my hair. I came out of the restroom & heard them call the boys' doubles match. I knew they were playing next & I heard them walking down the stairs, so I waited at the bottom of the stairs to hi-5 them. I went upstairs to watch them play & then noticed he took my racket xD I didn't even notice when he walked by, and thanks for telling me LOL. Not like I would've really cared haha. And then I saw Jamie was playing so I was like, oh, he just needed a racket. or he just liked mine more haha. I think it was final game? but I don't remember. They lost to BC, and one of their players were hurt. Still, they lost, & got 2nd. Not bad though. They split their final game too. Lee looked like he was trying hard but Vito messed that up. Coach did say Lee would try harder than Vito :p and once Vito's in that mood of his, he's not gonna play as well.

We were hoping to leave but nooo, we gotta wait for the awards. But there was still the boy's singles 1st/2nd place playing. Both from BC & they were taking such long breaks. Axl was like, just hurry up & play and they're both from BC, just take the dang awards. xD bc either way, the plaque goes to BC LOL They're rallies were so long, people were falling asleep.
Anyway, Joyce took some people home first. She asked if I needed a ride to Axl's. At first, I just didn't want dad to drive me back & forth, but then I didn't want to bother them & their riding arrangements so I told them I do. Lee who was listening on turned to me & asked "you're going home?" I looked at him and said no. And then he asked if I was going to Axl's. I said maybe.
We went downstairs for the awards, and we were by the door. I got my award so I went back to the door & stood in the hallway, behind Lee who was standing on the other side of the door (this explanation is probably confusing LOL). Shelly asked if he was going to Axl's & he said probably. Then he went to get his award. Then we all left.

I went home to shower before going to Axl's. I ended up going late I guess? When I got there, Mary/Vito/Lee/Axl went out to buy drinks I guess. I was sitting on the floor next to Mai, who was sitting on a chair. They came maybe 15 min I was there. I leaned back a lil' & saw them come in, then turned back to the TV to "pretend to watch." I think I looked back twice. Heard them ask Lee, "you're leaving?" and he said yeah. Grabbed his stuff & was walking out the door. Axl had that metal "screen" door, and Lee was outside and was about to close the door and he called my name out pretty loud. It kinda surprised me. LOL. It was so sudden I leaned back pretty fast xD and then there was like 2 sec. silence as we looked at each other. I could still just barely see him; he was smiling that smile of his. And then he said "Bye~!" and I think I said bye, or maybe I just waved, or maybe I did both. It was like a special bye bc he only addressed me kekeke okay maybe it's just my lil' girl mind that's thinking too much xD Still :p

The next day, they got choir competition, so they left pretty early. We all ended up leaving Axl's place before 12, but we were watching "Flu," a Korean horror/gruesome movie. Didn't even get to finish it~

I was too lazy to post this week, so I don't remember much. If it was important I'd remember... if there's something w/ Lee, I think I'd remember too :p

So Monday (5/4) we had our team game. I just got out of school, and Jim drove me to the gym. When I got there, Ivy told me who I had to play. Lee saw me & said "I'm counting on you" but I was playing newcomer Lindsey. Uhm, that's hecka evil xD That's 'cause Vito staggered his team, meaning he lined them up not according to their skill :p
After the games, Coach told us that Vito's team won (sucker) & that we still had a chance though. We just had to find all the mistakes in an essay (& I knew it's Vito's LOL). So we did, gave it to Coach. but nothing else. (This other time Coach did a bonding game thingy, was it the same day? I don't remember, but we got in groups & a plate w/ chocolates, & we had to see what flavor it was)
I really don't remember what else...

(5/5) Read Rockstar xD

(5/6) Practice. Afterward, we had a varsity meeting for League in the locker room. She also told them to bring food, extra clothes, & rackets. Lee turned to me & called me & said "You got my back right?" w/ that smile. And I said "I only have 2! My sister took her racket back" lol but I don't know if he heard me say Jim took her racket back. When we left, he was on the phone outside. His dad left him bc we took too long xD So he had to wait for his ride lol.

So today we had practice (& somewhat open gym) at 3. I got there at around 2:45, went inside the gym, saw no nets set up, & saw them sitting outside near the benches so I went out to join them. It was a little awk. hehe. They were playing speed & BS. Axl & Coach were kinda running late :p Well Axl came from inside the campus. Coach was stuck in traffic. Lee didn't get to the gym til exactly 3? lol. JohnJay was calling Axl at this moment on my phone, and then I guess Axl asked who it was & he said me xD.
After he ended his call, Lee asked JohnJay how long they've been waiting & he said since after school. Since Lee didn't have a 4th period, he went home. JohnJay asked where he came from, and, with a straight face & wide eyes, he said "from the trash can." I could not not laugh LOL. He's been bringing that up ever since I messaged him after the Stagg tournament ahahaha. Seeing as Coach & them weren't there, he walked off across the street w/ his stuff to buy himself & Vito some Rockstar. (Coach Lynch came by & fist-bumped me & Vito, who was sitting on the floor in front of me; I was standing. And he said "we got some award winners right here")
He came back, & gave Vito one & had one for himself. Vito asked how much it was. Lee said $5 for one LOL. & that he spent a total of $11 on both of them. Vito said he could've just bought it at Food4Less for cheap. Lee was like "just kidding, 2 for $5" and laughed. Then Vito was like "oh then I don't feel so bad." He gets up bc by now, Axl came by w/ the key. Lee opened his can & drank. He walked by me & asked if I wanted some (I'm pretty sure I wasn't staring at him or anything o.o). I told him I've never tried Rockstar & he kinda gave me a look lol. Don't know what kind of look though lol. Jim & Vito were like "you don't know what it is?" and I'm just like no. He offered again, so I took it. Turned away from them & tried to drink it but then decided to make sure first. So I turned around to Lee & asked "do I just drink from it or waterfall?" and he said waterfall. So I turned around again, trying to waterfall. Couldn't do it xD & I was telling them I can waterfall from a bottle but not a can. Vito was like who can or something like that. So I just attempted to. And I drank like 2 drops (bc waterfalling is too hard lol) and I ended up spilling a bit. xD Got his can sticky hehe ^^' my bad. He didn't mind (well, he didn't show it lol) He just drank it after I gave it back to him. I told them it tasted like soda xD It didn't taste too bad... When we were walking in, he was telling Jim I think that he drank Rockstar at night, & ended up staying up all night. 

Since league is this Friday, we had practice. Nothing much. Doubles practiced w/ Coach & singles were w/ Axl. Drills were okay. I think after our second drill, Mai was serving to me. She looked behind her (where the boys' doubles were training w/ Coach) and then she smiled at me. Well, at least I thought it looked like she was giving me the smile. But no response from me 'cause I really didn't know why she was smiling. lol
At the end we played our "boy versions" lol. so V1 v V1 etc. I had another fun game w/ Adrian :) the 1st set wasn't too bad, but I don't think he was all into it. The 2nd set I think I played bad, like I couldn't run (not like couldn't but yeah).
~~
Skyping w/ Jim & Jen & talking about my blog post about playing doubles w/ him & how we beat Ricky/Tong. I started doubting myself if we had won so I messaged him. They were both on my FB omygahhhh. lol. And then I ended the convo w/ "See U" blue cat sticker (bc all he said was "oh.........okay" lol.) He had gotten off already, but sent me a sleeping Pusheen sticker 40min-ish later xD He still does not seem like a sticker person ahaha >//w\\<

Had a really fun day today ^^ Got up early in the morning to get to McD to meet up with everybody else. When we got there, coincidentally, Lee also just got there. I saw his truck, me & Jim were just getting our stuff out of the car and he called our names and Jim said good morning to him. We followed behind him in. Jim bought food for Jen to bring back to mom. Jeremy was surprised that I wore short shorts for the first time lol. So we got our food. After giving food to Jen to take, Jim had 2 extra McMuffins and she gave one to Axl. She made me ask Lee, but he was like "really? Oh give it to JohnJay or the other guys." and he follows up by asking JohnJay if he still wanted him to buy him food. After I gave the McMuffin to JohnJay, he told Lee no.(Did he reject me bc I "gave" him to Adrian yesterday? xD) Then JohnJay asked him for change. He bought himself iced coffee. We about to leave, but he was still waiting for his coffee. At first I waited w/ Justin for him, then Justin left. Mai came in to throw away some stuff & we waited for JohnJay. Took forever. Everyone was waiting in the van, so we ran to it. Jeremy & Lee were sitting in the back. Justin sat next to the window in the middle row. So Jeremy says someone small needs to sit between them. Mai was already inside, about to sit next to Justin. We look at each other, and then she says "ugh, fine." I think she thought that it would be awkward if I took the seat. So I sat between Justin & JohnJay.

On the ride, they were talking about coffee & tipping cows xD I swore someone said don't put on seat belts so I felt weird that I did. Bc from what I could see, nobody else had seat belts. And when I mentioned that, Jim turned around & looked & said I wasn't the only one, Lee also had his seat belt on. I only saw the belt, since it reaches past the step, but didn't necessarily mean the person had a seat belt on. So I look back to double check & said "oh." We were the only two. (on the ride back, someone said safety first & I think it was him :p) Axl told us that he'd give a dollar to whoever can spot a turkey (as we passed the grassy areas) JohnJay was actually looking LOL. And Jeremy imitated the sound of a turkey SO well we all cracked up. 
We barely got to Independence on time. Mixed doubles was first. So me & Lee went to warm up next to Axl & Jim. Afterwards our games got called. Man, me & Lee could've won that game! TT I did a few good shots; esp. happy w/ my backhand crosscourt hairpins. Even he said "good shot" on them ^^ I felt like I played better w/ him. My shots were pretty good today at least. (Coach was right; we do play better when we are outside of Stockton haha)
I wished it lasted longer... I really liked playing w/ him :3
Jim & Axl split but lost. For consolation... we ended up playing each other. & I messed up big time. I don't even know why TT They went on to play their next game, but lost.
Then we were just waiting for guys' doubles to play. When guys' doubles started, Coach took me, Justin, Jim, & Mai out to Milpitas. We came back after buying some food & drinks from Sweetheart Cafe I think & Quickly. We got back to the gym for girls' doubles, but found out that the guys haven't even played yet.
Lee & JohnJay were playing cards. I was just tired so I slept on the floor. Jim was over there asking Lee to play cards w/ her. (she told me she tried to set it up for me but meh :p) & then they went to eat food. I just kinda watched over the stuff. Jim told me that he eats a LOT. Before we left for Milpitas, he ate a burger. Apparently that wasn't enough bc after they ate the popcorn chicken & whatever else was there, he asked Coach if she had more food bc he was still hungry x'D Poor kid. We were all waiting so we ended up playing DixIt. Me and Jim sat across from Lee, and we were taking selfies & pics of them, & then she ended up taking a pic of him to send to Jen LOL.
I don't remember in what order, but I think we afterward we played "cover the blanket" (chinese game) that's like SlapJack. They were sitting in a circle on the floor, & me and Shelly were sitting on the chairs; I sat behind Lee. Just watching them play was funny. Lee was slow! Kekeke. Afterward they asked if we wanted to play. I really didn't want to play. Shelly would only play if I did, so I did. And then Lee said he was done so we switched spots.

After a long while, Axl & Lee finally played their game. Seeing the opponent, Lee said they were done. They came back after winning the game. And Axl was joking w/ Lee about how he said they were gonna lose; Lee was being defensive saying he didn't say that xD They played their 2nd game I think. We watched. And dayum, their opponent didn't even care about them; they played so nonchalantly, which annoyed me bc it meant they didn't take them very seriously -.- They ended up losing. After the game, at first I thought Axl was mad(?) bc he went out to take a breather. He came back and sat next to me & I thought I'd ask, even though I watched the game: "How was the game?" He said it was pretty good bc it was better than he thought they'd do, but felt bad bc they were targeting Lee. I saw that too... T3T

Then me & Jim played our girls' doubles. We played so bad our first game & ended up playing consolation. I thought Jim was mad after that game. We did better in our consolation games LOL & ended up making it to finals consolation, so we stayed later than expected. There were some good rotations that we did ^^ It just came naturally after a while. Jim numbed her hand a bit -3- I wished we'd taken home something for causing everybody to stay so late. (They were hoping to get home before the Pacquiao vs Mayweather match; apparently Lee betted $500 on Pacquiao. Who knows if that is true LOL)
I took Justin's seat by the window bc I planned to sleep the way back. Jeremy wanted JohnJay to sit in the back w/ them but he didn't want to, til Jeremy threatened to not teach him how to solve the Rubik's cube xD JohnJay complained that it'll be squishy in the back but Jeremy's solution was for him, JohnJay, & Justin to sit in the back, & Lee sit in the middle row. Jim was being such an instigator & she was like "yeah yeah" LOL. Lee just said "F*" hella loud xD And we all laughed. So he sat in the middle row, but mumbled-ish something about Mai sitting in the middle (bt us), I guess so I could sit next to Mai?
I don't remember if this was on both trips back & forth, but Jamie kept singing off-key on purpose LOL. We couldn't stop laughing. On the way to Independence, Rihanna's "Rude Boy" came on & Jeremy was getting everyone to sing I guess? and told Lee to join them. Lee said he didn't even know the song. Jeremy's response was: "you'll know it after this" LOL. On the way back though, they were singing like in harmony (I mean, most of them were in choir LOL.) When Jamie purposely sang off-key though, we'd all laugh again xD
Jim offered us Pocky. I took a small packet (bc they come in small bags). And she was asking the others. Mai got one and also passed back some. Lee took one too (but Jim told me later he didn't say he wanted one 'til she met eye contact w/ him haha) He must've been hungry bc he finished his pack fast. I ended up napping til we got off the highway in Stockton; it's already like 8 something at night.

We were dropping people off and they were wondering who to drop off first, so we dropped off Mai & Justin first, since they live close by. JohnJay kept asking Lee where'd he live so he could be dropped off, but he still didn't want us to know xD but of course he had to give in since Axl was dropping us off. Jeremy was dropped off next. The door was kid-locked, meaning it can only be opened from the outside. Jim had to get out to open the door 3 times. Each time, Lee tried the door. When Axl dropped us off, he was like, "this is where you live?" and I just said yup. I was getting out, but he didn't try to open the door for me >3> & I even said that: "you're not gonna open the door for me?" in a joking/exasperated-ish tone. He said Jim gots it. What he doesn't know was, Jim already unlocked the door when Jeremy got out :p Psh, he tried 3 times to open the door, he couldn't try a 4th time, so I had to reach over him to open the door. Meanie =3=

Finally! Done w/ this long day. xD Jim kept complaining that I didn't interact w/ him :p

There was open gym for people to practice for the tournament. Lee was playing non stop games. Anyway, the whole point, was even though we were supposed to play doubles against Axl/Jim & practice w/ each other, we kept getting pulled into other games & so timing was always off. He was going to play w/ me, but then Adrian was like Lee let's play a game! & then Lee turns to me, starting to say that he was going to play w/ me (or needs to practice w/ me) but I didn't want to deny Adrian his game. He was already whining to Lee: It's just a singles gameeee. lol So I was like "It's okay, you can play your game." And I went off to hit w/ Ivy, of course, after he went to prepare to hit w/ Adrian. He did give me a look that seemed to say he didn't want to, like it was really innocent, kinda like a puppy yearning look >///< *Sorrryyy~*

Afterward, when we can finally play together, we played against Tong & Ricky. At first we tried actual mixed doubles, but I suck at the front. We ended up winning though lol. It was really nerve-wracking > < The main point of not doing actual mixed doubles was bc I suck at front LOL but I also didn't want him running in the back by himself. I'm a singles player, I can handle it.
[Do you see what I mean? Tong & Ricky were way better than the team we played. Ugh. I wish that moment could be replayed...]

Anyway, before his game w/ Adrian he was getting water. Tong had asked to play me, but he didn't have a racket (nor did we have a court) so we were just waiting. Then Lee asked to play? but Nancy asked wasn't I playing w/ Tong. So we asked Tong. He said he wanted to play mixed w/ me. I thought he wanted to play against me, so I was like "but he's my partner *points to Lee*." He was listening too. Then Ricky asked him who's his partner. He points to me & says "she's my partner." Ahahaha that was the funniest exchange of convos xDD Jim said she was on the court listening/laughing to it.

Technically, it wasn't the first time we played mixed before. Before season started, we played mixed together for fun :p

Coach picked me up for EHS grad in the morning. It went by pretty fast, only about an hour and a half. Me and Coach quickly looked for people to take pics. We got almost everyone, just missed Sarah. I thought it was going to be awkward w/ Lee since I just gave him the letter yesterday. It's a 50/50 chance he read it already. We were in a hurry w/ all the pics so we just switched photographers quickly (me & coach LOL). I was getting awk. & kinda just left, like panicked & forgot to say bye *shrugs*). He said bye to Coach, then 1.5 sec later he says bye to me. I turned around awkwardly, trying not to be but of course probably failed, & gave him a small wave. He hesitated saying that bye, I think. 

Coach stayed at our house for a bit bc she didn't want to go yet. We talked about a bunch of random stuff. Remember saying that if anyone came into our room, I gotta remember to hide his "purse" keychain (the messed up one w/ his name)? Well I kinda forgot, & Coach comes into the room. I give Jim the look, back & forth b/t Pikachu & her. She finally got it and slowly hid the keychain under her. I was sleeping on the inside of the bed. Jim got up to use the restroom... and accidentally pulls the keychain w/ her. It was a slow-mo moment where I see Coach see it and Coach watches me pull the keychain away. She exclaims! and now she knows. She said she can't believe my taste, and she asked me what part of him I like. I was like iunno! xD She can't tell that I liked him, but she keeps thinking he's interested in me lol She keeps asking me to consider her brother but uhm, no. Sorry xP

Later we went to Tong's BBQ at his brother-in-law's place, after going to Walgreen to buy stuff. The cashier was pretty cute & funny lol.
At the BBQ, we didn't do much at first. His sister made this cookie ice cream sandwich cake *o* It was yummy~ She made the big cookies~
Afterward, Jen comes. Alin comes way later. We played pool while at the same time playing charades. Tong was getting drunk haha. They let me try a wine cooler. It wasn't even that bad, tasted like Ramune. Brandan & Connie were surprised at me drinking lol Tong was getting so drunk though lol. They kept saying I was drunk -3- I was fiiiineeee :p
It was getting late, like 11 something so we went inside to watch a movie. Tong offered Jim red wine, & I tried some. It wasn't that bad. We were going to watch "Annabelle." I asked for pillows & drunk Tong passed me all 3 pillows xD After we said happy bday to him at 12am (bc his actual bday was the 31st), we were going to leave. We watched a lil bit of Annabelle. I was whispering to Jim about leaving and then I saw him looking over. I looked back, thinking he had something to say to me. He says, & points at me: "Stop staring." LOL I shrunk away into the couch next to Jim. We just all died ahaha I wasn't even staring psh xD
He said thanks to us & that if we needed to go, just go. After a while, we said we were going to go. Jim was about to get up & puts the pillow on Tong. Tong says "you can't leave yet" and kinda swings the pillow back on Jim's head, and she sits back down. LOL The funny thing is, he says we can go anytime, but didn't let Jim go xDD We still left after. He is so drunk haha.

What a long day~

This week I was so busy, including 2 graduations.

Mon (5/25), me & Jo went ice skating w/ Jessica, Cheng, Jay, and Wang. The guys didn't know how to ice skate lol so Jo took Wang and I was w/ the others. Jessica took a while to remember how to skate. Cheng's pretty good :3 But Jay, he didn't want to learn xD so he took a few steps along the wall, but ended up sitting out. After an hour-ish, we left to eat Mexican food. We walked :p
But nothing happeneddddd >x< Then we hung out at the park, prank called people. Prank called Meimei hahaha
~
I graduated this Tuesday, May 26, at Delta's Atherton Auditorium. That morning we had grad. rehearsal, then later that night, our official ceremony took place at 6pm. It was pretty quick, only an hour, but it felt long. Sorry to say, but I was falling asleep xDD had to tell Meimei to shake me awake lol In my head I'm just thinking that would be embarrassing to get caught falling asleep during the "important day of my teen life" lol And then after grad, quick pics, but it was pretty rushed. Most of the pictures w/ were random people I passed by xD mostly guys LOL. The only girl pics I had were w/ POLARIS, too bad Minar left too fast :p Apparently Robin was going to ask me for a pic, but I was busy taking family pics. Weird thing was Uncle Alan, Andrew's dad, came to help us take me & my sisters' group photo xD so awk haha. After I took a pic w/ Adrian, my dad told me to take a pic w/ Andrew but it was awk for me to ask him to take a pic w/ me. I was about to go, but then I saw his dad walking toward us already, and he called Andrew over. (Bc my dad, as loud as he is, "commanded," in a way, for his son to come take a pic w/ me. When we were taking pics, he mumbled to me about us being the 2 badminton players LOL. And then my pic w/ John, I wanted to take a pic w/ Rachel bc she was sho cute~ But I was in a hurry... Right after, I rushed to banquet (bc banquet was on the same day ToT) Jim called Axl/Coach to make sure they stayed (really, she only wanted Lee to stay LOL). I got there & some of them stayed, mostly the returners & seniors. They congratulated me & bombarded me w/ hugs, then we took pics & everyone hurriedly left. Love them so much; sorry for making them wait ^^' When I got in, I heard Lee call my name, but everyone was surrounding me, hugging me & congratulating me, all I was able to do was a quick look in his direction, don't even think there was eye contact :p After the group pics, & anyone else who wanted to take pics w/ me, Nanette & Nicole "helped" me to take a pic w/ him, but too bad their phone cam quality were not that good >3<
Afterward, it was only the Jose twins, me, Coach, & Mai. After we left, we chatted for a while w/ Jen Jim & Jo. Lee just left, and we watched his truck leaving. He turned toward us & Coach said bye so he waved & we waved back. Mai said "Coach you can't wave to him!" She turns to me, "oh but you can" Then Coach whiningly says "Why~" and Mai answers "because they're dating." *insert Coach's surprised exclamation of what* "well, not yet. but they're going to." And then there's me dying of laughter & embarrassment, telling Mai to stop and telling Coach not to believe her. My sisters were in the car dying of laughter. After that we went out separate ways. Omgee Mai is killing me xD
When I got home, I changed shoes & me, Jen, & Jim met Nancy & Alin at Chili's. We had dinner there (saw Eli too xD). After dinner, finally got homeee~ and then showed Mom pics of grad & Angela & Jessie & Andrew xD
~
Wed (5/27), I was supposed to go bowling but change of plans bc someone wanted to hang w/ Sai but he had work. So they moved it to Thur. (so I had to go bowling, instead of spending Jessica's bday w/ her >o<)
~
Thurs (5/28), went back to school for senior breakfast, diplomas, & signing yearbooks. Good day, good day ^^ Gave Jessica her presents~ (I did her dango last minute last night, and I went to sleep at 2-3am. Just glad it came out a lot better than the first one) Then I got senior photos from Steph & Jess. I hurriedly got my yearbook signed by people. Eh, I asked Grant to sign my yearbook, but I thought it might be awkward after I rejected him, but he left me a nice note ^^ and then... there was Victor's message: Too many words, too little space. Dayum, I'm gonna miss him so much haha. We had pancakes & egg & sausage. I was really reluctant to sign my yearbooks then bc it was gonna get dirtied ToT but no choice :p At the end we had to go over to the college career center for a short assembly kind of thing. I got Roberto and Stripes to sign before we left. Sorry to hold them back hahaha. Steph wanted a pic w/ him but nooo she didn't go for it. xD
At the assembly, Mr Thom explained to us about a challenge coin thingy that originated as some kind of identification in the military. And that at the end of our mission at SECA, the school had ordered each one of us a coin, it was presented to us as the mission is completed aka attending a 4year university/college, handed out by ranking. It was really cool~ Seriously, SECA is the best~ <3
Afterward, we could just lounge around, sign yearbooks, turn in gowns & get our diplomas. I got more people to sign my yearbook. After a while, as the line shortened we got in line too. Stripes happened to be in line. For Steph, who wanted a senior photo from him but didn't think he'd give her one/it was awk, I DM-ed him on Twitter even though we were standing behind him. LOL. I put my phone away. Seconds later, he turns around, and says "what?" in that breathy way of his lol and I put out my hand and said jokingly "where's my picture? your senior portrait~" (I cannot believe I did that LOL I didn't mean to sound demanding hehe) Then he was like "you want one?" and I was like yeah~ then started joking around about him getting famous & selling his photo & autograph (I made him sign it hehe) Then Steph, who was with me, chips in saying she wants one too. (Me & Steph had the same taste; we chose the same photo & took the last 2 ahaha I just didn't like the ones in the gown xD) Eventually people who passed by like Jessie & Carrie & Angela & Bea LOL started sounding offended bc he didn't give them one xD Whoops, sorry for the trouble Stripes bahaha. His "CEO pose" were more popular, too bad me & Steph took the last ones haha. Turned in our gowns & got our diploma~ it looks so nice~
When school got out, I went to Ms. West's to get my yearbook signed & for extra autograph sheets (which she didn't ask for me to pay for) & Steph got her pic w/ Stripes thanks to Angela's obvious ways ahaha. Then I went to get Mr. Thom's sign but he took forever bc as he was writing, he was chit-chatting w/ people :p Finally got home, I quickly finished up my letters to Mary, Vito & Lee, since I was going to see them to go bowling. As I was writing my letters, Lee texted me, since I had to go pick him up. He was being weird, as always, but in one text, slightly weirder lol.

We went to pick him up, and he texted me, making me feel like we got to the wrong house xD He chatted w/ us in the car, & yup, he forgot about that "Love comes in many forms" convo ToT I told him he talked to me in the beginning of junior year, but stopped talking to me afterward. He said, "well that sucks" lol. We got to West Lane bowl, but waited in the van bc Mary & them weren't here yet. I asked him to sign my yearbook --extra sheets-- & he chose the orange pen (he likes orange bc it's the color of the sunset LOL) He was about to write then said he forgot everything haha. (He lied to meee, he said he couldn't write cursive during season, but at that moment said he only wrote in cursive > > I cannot trust him :p )
We saw Christian & Stella (their class prez) arrive so we got outta the car & walked w/ them inside. Ivy was sitting inside alone LOL. When everyone was finally here, the guys got a lane & played first. Then the girls got a lane for themselves. & me, Adrian, Ivy, Jeremy/Joyce, & Mai got a lane later, but far from the rest bc, stupid cashier > > After bowling, we went to Wingstop & then to the park. Even though we didn't get to be near each other at the bowling alley or Wingstop, I'm just glad he got to hang out & have fun w/ everyone else :) That's all that matters. Before Adrian left, I asked him to sign my yearbook. I didn't think he had much to write to me, but what he wrote was really touching <3
We got to Unity Park, and it was kinda awk bc I was the only one not from their squad & stuff. Alex, Adrian's cousin by marriage, was the only one who formally introduced himself to me. We watched Vito & Lee try tennis for the first time. It was funny. Mary's really good at it haha. Then we went to play basketball. It was okay, but I felt like the others were awk playing w/ me. I felt awk playing w/ them. Afterward, they all stopped playing and we just went back into the tennis court cage. I was messaging Meimei & they said they could stop by~ TwT Kinda glad they came to get me, but I felt guilty that I was on my phone & w/ them instead of who I was supposed to hang out with. To be honest, it was almost suffocating bc of the pressure of being w/ their squad... I introduced the groups, well only to Lee, Vito, & Mary bc out of everybody, they're the ones I really know. I could've introduced the others since I knew their names :p but that's weird haha. Lee & Mary said their names & greeted them-ish, psh, rude Vito lol. Even though I invited them to play volleyball w/ us, since Sam brought one, they didn't join us, I mean, it would've been completely awk for them. I went to play volleyball w/ them bc, I mean, I can't just send them back after they delivered me water. Lee, Vito, Mary & Marianne went to play some more basketball. If Mary was watching me, she'd notice that I was a lot more happier playing volleyball w/ them then when I was hanging out w/ their squad. I didn't really mean anything, but it's kinda expected right? So when they went home, Meimei and them said bye really loud to them. I saw Vito's arm stick out to wave lol. After that, I went back into the tennis court too and sat down on the floor next to the bench. Lee was doing soccer tricks w/ the basketball; forgetting it wasn't a soccer ball, he bounced it off his head, and it hurt lol. The ball rolled toward me & I bounced it back to him after he stopped rubbing his head xD It was getting pretty late, like 9pm, to the point where we can barely see the tennis ball. Lee went to play on the swings by himself (I had that thought before he did, but I didn't want to leave the group again) & it was funny watching him swing lol. The people who were playing basketball asked if they could play tennis against Sai. Vito let them, and Lee came back. I was cautious... and after 15min or so, they were done. Then we started to leave too. Before we got into the cars, I gave them the letters. Mary's friend took me home. They were really nice. I texted Mary when I got home, and she said she was "kinda sad that [I] was segregated from [them]" I didn't want to make her sad that I had more fun w/ my friends than w/ them (but technically, it was their friends + me... so it was difficult, esp. since I'm not that outgoing type)
Even though I didn't get to hang out w/ more of the badminton family, it was fine for me to just be in their presence & just watching them. That was good enough. ❤️
~
Fri (5/29), we were just at home & went to Costco for pics... I don't remember what else. I remembered I stayed up all night to finish Ivy's panda keychain & write the letters to her & Adrian. I slept at 4am and had to wake up early for their grad. I was surprised for having so much to write to Adrian, but I mean, I was touched by his message, too. 

Seriously, I got out of school, but this week, I got even less sleep then when I was in school. O-O

It was weird today. There were pretty much no classes for us. So a bunch of us were just in the college career center. I was writing Meimei's name in script in her yearbook, & I was also tweeting Grant (we had a misunderstanding & just started talking).
At some point, I went out w/ Jessica to use the restroom. On the way, we saw LeAnn & Steph pushing the books back into the book room. The key wouldn't work, & then John came along & managed to open it hehe. I was still DM-ing Grant, but the convo was taking some weird turning points, & I was showing Steph. She said we've been talking a lot.. well interacting. And I was like... we are? I guess we are.

We walked back to the room, & I continued to work on Meimei's name. And then he, who was literally sitting at the table next us, confessed to me. Well, he just said that he's had a crush on me like last month or something. It kinda shocked me, & I really didn't know what to say. Uhm, it was awkward bc we were in the same room. Then, Orion & John, who were sitting w/ him, starting talking to me, & they pulled me in the convo, but I pretended to be working & only answered them. Gaaah. I really didn't know how to reject him... that's the first time someone actually said it straight out to me (unlike Robin, he didn't say it straight out, but he was late -3- )

*EDIT: apparently I forgot to mention how I answered him lol but I told him that I was just shocked, & then that's when he asked how I felt. Took me a while, but I knew I had to answer him, so I told him that I like some guy from another school.

But he's a really nice guy, so I hope he finds his other half :)

Day after sections, hiked. Met Qi's BF uh.. impression was meh. Finally made it up there. Tong is my brother now~~ LOL

Linda fell on our last stretch back.

After hike, eat it all back at a Thai restaurant called Mango Garden. Our waiter was a player~ lol not that cute, but not bad looking either.

Finally it's section time > < Skipping school haaaah. Mai & Mary came to pick me up~
So the first game was vs. a Davis high girl. She was really nice & funny. Had a cool coach too. I lost to her so I played in the losers' bracket. I won my next 2 games but in the end I lost to St. Mary's, which was really annoying. We split too. I'm sorry guys ToT

After I changed, we were going to meet up w/ Lee & Vito for lunch. Mary started Facebook messaging w/ them two. Vito taking long time to reply, and I guess Lee wasn't replying to Coach, so she told us to text Lee. Mary doesn't have his number, and she asked me if I had it & I said yeah. Mai said "you would have it." They were teasing me about "getting all the guys" after I was telling them about Victor texting me, asking if I was ok. (He was worried I was sick or something happened and he texted me at 10, on break from the AP test xD silly guy) I told them about other stuff about him, how we first chatted, and how I tell him lots of stuff & I didn't give a name, just said he, & Mary was like don't say friend, just say boyfriend. and I was like "Nooo, he's like my brother."
So when Mai said I was getting all the guys she continued, "Yeah, like Lee" & then they're all like "oh yeahhh!" & coach says "he doesn't talk to girls" & Mary says, "yeah. he talks to me, but only a lil' bit" & i say he doesn't even talk to me that much, but it's not like they were listening to me LOL

We went to Hobby Lobby because Coach was looking for some grad gifts. I was still texting Lee. Then Mary added me to the FB group message because her phone was dying. I read the previous messages & she had told him to reply to me. And then followed up w/ "your gf hahaha" & he says "I don't have a GF" & then asks where's vito xD after quite a long time debating, we finally told them the Habit, & waited for them to get there. When he said they'll get there soon, I told coach & we were gonna get there b4 they do. Axl bought an aux cord at Hobby Lobby. We got to the car before Axl, and Coach left him. We thought she was joking, but she really went out of the parking lot, down to the next plaza, but of course, she went back to pick him up. When he tried to get in, Coach moved the car forward. He went along, told her to keep going, & hopped into the car as it moved. Poor Axl!
We got to the In-n-Out plaza to wait for them. We waited by the car. I texted him where they were at. He said 8 min. After 8 min. passed I asked if they were here yet, and he said yeah. Then we saw his car. He came out of the car & I don't know why but I had a moment, that anime moment LOL. I was just shocked. In a good way. After that initial few seconds, I was like why did I have that moment LOL. I don't even know! He didn't look that much special/different, Must be 'cause I didn't see him for 2 days LOL (but can't be... lol) Probably 'cause he wasn't in a regular t-shirt baahhaha. So Coach (or was it Lee?) asked where we were going to eat, because Lee said he was hungry, even though Vito said he wasn't hungry. I said "I'm hungryyy~" in a whiny way lol. Afterward we chose the habit, well Vito chose it lol.

Lee does walk slow haha I ended up walking slightly in front of him because everyone was ahead of us. As we neared the habit, Mai/Mary walked in (and we were getting bunched up at the door) I held the door for them. At first, Lee would've went in but he stopped. I looked at him. He didn't go. Vito, who was standing next to Lee, had that Tsk, you two weirdos kind of look at us& walked in. So me & Lee were at the door, "arguing" who should go first. LOL. We were like telling each other to go. It wasn't going anywhere so I went haha. We stood by the trash can by the door lol. When I moved closer to the customer waiting seats, he went and sat next to Coach, and we were just all talking about what to eat and stuff.
I ordered food for them. They went to find a seat first. So when me and Coach joined them, this was the seating arrangement: Coach, Mary, Vito, Lee (in front of the window); Mai, Axl, me (across from them on chairs), so I sat across from Lee. I had no choiceeee lol. Technically I served them :p I felt like I had to, I don't know why xD I guess they had a kid's aura lol. 
When the food came, Mary moved Coach's seat to next to Lee, so Coach sat in front of me -3-
Vito & Lee eat so messily! xD I was comparing me & Mary's muscle b/t the thumb & index finger (the web) back during the car ride. & she wanted to see Vito's & Lee's. Vito didn't have an obvious one. & even though we said it was his racket hand, he said "Lee does everything" lolol.
Then Vito started asking Lee about his life, kinda. & I told Coach in Chinese, known him for 4 years & now you ask about his family? xD (When I told my sisters this they said, known him for 4 years & still don't know where he lives? LOL) He also asked him when he was leaving for Iowa. He said after he gets his diploma (He lieeee. He told me he won't be leaving right after ToT) & he was talking to Coach, he said he's coming back in 2 years (I wasn't listening to their convo though). Coach said he's going to Iowa to get married; he said he's not gonna get married that early. Coach asked me something about his 2 years, like what is his reason. I don't even know what she's asking LOL. So i was so lost, & I told her that I don't understand & Lee, who was of course listening, just laughed. We just sat & talked. Vito saw Mai's Stagg-talking-to-boyfriend & then everything went awkward lol. Coach went to say hi. When she came back she said let's play truth or dare & I was like nooo i'm not playing that (too risky LOL) & then she sat down & told Axl to go say hi. He did. I turned around to watch, & was talking to coach. In mid-sentence I turned to face Coach, but she disappeared on me! So I was talking to nobody & Lee watched (or was watching) me, & I was like "Heh? Where's coach? how can she leave me like that when I'm talking to her xD" I don't remember if he gave a response or not lol
Coach brought him to introduce us I don't even know whyyyy it was so awkwarddd LOLOL
Coach had peppers/jalapenos & wanted to play a game so loser will eat it. She played against Mary & Mary lost. They played again & she lost again lol. Then Coach wanted to play Lee, but Lee said he sucked at rock-paper-scissors & wouldn't play. He told Coach to play me, but I was like "nuuuu I can't handle spicy." xD
(Near the end, this one time I saw Lee watching me (I wouldn't say staring) chew on my straw. & I was thinking Is it weird that i'm chewing the straw? lol Also, when Coach was talking to Vito, w/ Lee in between them, and when everyone else was talking, I was just thinking to myself, huh, he doesn't talk much.)

We walked to Bon Mange for desert. Axl and I got them snowflake & macarons. Axl & Vito were playing chess (smart ppl) & we played jenga (dumb ppl) (according to Coach ahaha) LOL Afterward we played card games together. One was "blanket" (I guess, is the translation). It was so funny because Lee & Axl had the slowest reaction xD Then we played like heads up & charades. Lee didn't want to play because he said he sucked at them 'cause he didn't know anything. Mary said "ooh fairy tales" and he was like oh yeah, then said nevermind because he thought it was the anime LOL I guess we were all pretty tired afterward. We played for 2-3 hrs-ish. Lee was pretty quiet; on his phone.
We were waiting for Vito's ride so we sat on the comfy couch. Lee sat at one of the tables playing Clash of Clans. Axl fell asleep. Coach was talking to Vito about Emily & other stuff (that I will not mention here :p) & talking about how guys could possibly like Vito & talking about how gay people were prettier than straight people (most of the time). Then they talked about how Vito (& Lee?) care about their looks. Vito said he doesn't, but Lee does lol (liesss xD they probably both do haha) Then they were talking about how Lee looked better in short hair. & Vito agreed LOL Then Mai says my name out loud at this moment & I said "whaaat~" & Mary leans over & whispers something to Vito & I'm sure I heard my name LOL also she gave me eye contact, w/ that look lol Then Lee turned around & says "talking bout my long hair?" & we were like yeah etc.
I whispered to Coach if she was going to take me home. I think she heard Lee instead of me so she asked him if she had to take him home xD
Vito/Mary/Mai's ride was here so we were going to leave. I was like "uh do I wake Axl?" 'cause I thought their car was outside & Coach was just walking them out. Guessing not, I tapped Axl's knee. No response. I cautiously tapped Axl's shoulder & Lee called me. Idunno why, so that I would leave Axl? lol I turned around to him then turned back to Axl & at the same time, Axl popped up, which scared me a little lol. (Earlier, I was telling Coach how Axl was a light sleeper, but she said he's hard to wake xD)

On the ride home, Coach was going to drop off Lee first, but when we were on the overpass toward EHS, he said "we might as well drop off Justina first" so Coach did. xD We were gonna drop him off, but we were saying how he didn't want anyone to know where he lives. & I said, "he lives in a trash can" lol. After I took my stuff out of the trunk, I said bye to them, & Lee said bye to me + full name, as usual xD
On the way he also brought up the topic about grad tickets. Coach told him she was gnna get one for herself & me. Since they're getting 20 tickets, & he said no one's gonna go for him anyway(?, not a lot at least?) he said that he can get tickets for us. Coach said "ok, I'll tell Mary then." So the tickets are coming from him~ :3

~~
(Bc I'm lazy, here's a super quick, not-so-grammatically-correct summary of the night)
jen & jim come back. tell them the story. go to seoul tofu house for alin's grad dinner. brandan suddenly asks me if i liked anyone on the team. why so sudden xD. we were like shocked LOL. then he was like "well every year there's always a couple (at the end?)" and we were like "ahhh, yeah." I guess we were able to avoid answering that question LOL. later on, he said something about a bird & a cage; me & jim just gave each other a look. what a coincidence LOL

I hope I didn't leave anything out. Tomorrow's hiking! :D

After practice today, I was supposed to have this hangout w/ the team, but since Coach said she wanted to take me out so I cancelled with him. Lies. I was going to the Bay -.- She just wanted to take me out to eat. Coach! D:<

I think she called Mary & Lee but they were both sleeping xD She put Lee on speaker, and when he answered her that he was sleeping, a slight pause, and he said why but at that moment Coach hung up xD Right after she gets a text from him about calling him then hanging up lol funny. 
Coach ended up taking me out to eat w/ Coach Kate at the Habit. It was nice seeing her again. She lost a lot weight... We were at the Habit for a while. I was almost falling asleep. My bad :p It's just, I didn't have much to say, so I just listened.

I have been so tired this week, probably bc of long continuous practices & lack of sleep. I'm just really sore & I really hate having PE right before practice... I was just so out of it today.
When I was practicing w/ Axl, I think I was close to having a panic attack. Not really sure what it is, but it's like I couldn't breathe & I was stressing too much I guess? I was also very frustrated w/ myself. So I'm mad at myself to the point where I want to cry. You know that feeling? But I can't, of course. I don't even understand why myself. I just couldn't catch up w/ Axl's serves, and I was breathing really hard. And I mean really hard. Not even the regularly-breathing-trying-to-catch-a-breath breathing. I was struggling to even get any air inside me, like I had asthma. And there's this tight-knot in the back of my throat; it happens when holding back too much. I calmed myself when I had to practice my serves. When I was doing footwork or serves, I kept thinking about this "panic attack" and what I'm stressing over.

When practice was over, I felt better. Then me & Axl played Mary/John Jay. Apparently they had a winning streak of 6-0. We broke that streak LOL. It was a split though. So now their score is 6-2 ahaha they wanted a rematch & this time me & Axl won w/o a split. xD It was fun. Then Mary asked her friend if I could have some chow mein (bc I was really hungry). So me & Aizle had some chow mein in a cup! ahaha since there were no plates.

Then I asked Mary about the hangout. She didn't know about it....? 'cause I asked her about it then she asked Vito about it. Vito said he said Thursday but I told him that we cancelled & moved to next Friday. I'm thinking in my head hasn't he told them yet? then how the heck did he answer me 'about 10 people' are going bowling? LOL was I not supposed to have told them yet? xD I was just asking Mary what they would prefer to eat for dinner :p Then she said something about starting a FB chat for us, but I don't even know who us is TuT
but I liked planning w/ him.... lol

Me & Coach got to the gym before EHS was let out of school. We were so suspicious LOL.
Had practice. Coach was tired so she told Lee to hit with me. I'm gonna miss his "perfect"s & "good shot"s ToT He was playing non-stop. I guess practice was okay.
At the end of open gym he asked me about the hangout on Thursday, but I just found out Coach wanted to take me out to Bay area so I told him I couldn't go that day (Mai was between us; he was by the bleachers & I was in front of the storage room. It sounded like we were talking about a "date" LOL and she gave me the look xD And she kept saying, "I knew there something. I called it." and kept teasing me haha.) When almost everyone left except for a few still cleaning up, he asked me why I couldn't go. I was talking to him as I walked to him. He said "well, now I have to tell them we cancelled" xD I said, "next week~" and he was like "next week?" in that exasperated tone of his. lol

Went home. I weighed 122.9! LOL. Probably 'cause I didn't eat much. After the AP US Gov. exam, I only had that school lunch-fake peanut butter-w/ jelly sandwich. And at home I had a corn dog. I was so hungry during practice. Then I gained it all back at dinner LOL /dies.

So after I was done eating & whatnot, I messaged him & asked him if we could do next week. So we ended up discussing plans for the hangout day. This guy... he must really going to miss the team & playing badminton. He told me to find something to do but I told him I don't know. And he said he doesn't usually go out so he doesn't know. I was thinking about bowling after I asked what was something he wanted to do (bc Nancy & them always go bowling for hangout) and he said he wanted to go bowling once in his life but that it was expensive. He didn't even know there's bowling alleys in Stockton xD This kid... lol
After we got the bowling date figured out, he said he'll text me how many people are gonna go & then told me to text him when I figure out a place to eat at. And I tell him I don't have his number. He sends it to me and says "There"
I died the whole time talking to him. He's hilarious LOL.
So I guess us two are planning the hangout (I seriously hate planning... -3- ) & he's my connection to EHS ahahaha

~~
Coach talked on the phone during break at practice so I'm just waiting. And I'm watching everyone else hit. I'm just thinking, Everyone's here hitting for fun. Me? I'm over here stressin' out about sections & not really wanting to practice. At the same time, I'm trying to push myself so I don't disappoint... like I did last year. I should just keep in mind, I'm trying to keep Axl's job LOL

There was practice/open gym today. Lee messaged me asking if there was open gym, & after I told him there was, he said hurry up & get there bc everyone's waiting for me & Coach to open the gym; but then Coach ends up not going.
I had a 2 hour practice w/ Axl, & this was right after my 5K run. My muscles, esp front calves, easily tensed during practice, so it was hard to move; we went through the whole box of birdies, not just 6 or 12--the whole box. It was 5:30 when Axl said I was done. 30 more min of open gym. He played w/ XinSai against Mary/JohnJay. It was a funny game to watch. After that, he was done, & he packed up & left. Well, I thought he left, but he was outside & came back in. Then asked Axl if Coach was coming tomorrow & what time etc. And Axl's like "I don't know, where's Justina?" xD Then Lee turned to me to ask me what time, but I don't know either :p
I was so tired I was sitting next to the storage room, & he was standing on the corner. He was watching Axl play JohnJay I think. I just looked at him... bc this week is gonna be the last time I'll see him.

I messaged Coach for him, & when she replied, I let him know. Then I decided to ask about him moving to Iowa. I guess it's true. He really is moving after graduation. *sigh*
And then I tell him we need to hangout so I can get a pic w/ him too. And then he tells me he's a locked up bird. Sometimes, he could be poetic xD
And then we were planning a day we could go hangout. Eventually he asked if it was only us 2. And then the hangout turned into a team hangout lol. Not that I mind; I wouldn't know how to deal w/ it if it was only us 2 anyway... and then we talked about Coach, & he said she doesn't even care about us, & he's feeling neglected but that it was okay, he doesn't care anymore, just want to get banquet over with. And then he said, at least we'll get to eat at the banquet together [team]. I sent him a crying Pusheen & he asked when my grad was. I told him: same day & time as banquet. Then he said it was pointless going to the banquet when not everyone was going to be there. I told him I'd make it if I could; he just said "okay I guess." He sounded kinda mad that not everyone -ahem- only me - LOL could make it to banquet one last time. Aww, he must really love the team :3 He kept telling me to find a place for our Thur. "dinner" & I'm like I don't know whereeee. He told me to "just do it" & to "try my best." I gave him a tantrum Pusheen & he finally gave in, saying he'll ask the team keke. And he said we are going after open gym Thur. (once again, after I'm all sweaty & possibly big, dinner before sections -o- ) I just wanted to take pics in a regular outfit. Pics w/ the team is also sweaty face/hair & PE clothes oii. He ended the message / a bunny smiling sticker :3 It just doesn't seem like his style, but still cute hehe.

This whole convo seemed so close to a confession, yet so natural at the same time LOL.
I don't know... I've been thinking about the letter (if I'm really gonna write one) & it was just different ways of telling him w/o it really being a confession, but just to let him know. I doubt it'd make much difference anyway since he's moving to Iowa... I'm just glad to have been able to see him & hear him laugh so much today :'3

I was so sleepy after my shower, I took a nap. Didn't wake up 'til 11:30, even though I was suppose to be up by 9:30 -3- Gotta study for AP Gov tomorrow...

I've been preoccupied this weekend, bc badminton is now officially over. Well at least w/ everyone else. I still have practice for sections.
After last night, I just couldn't stop thinking about it.
Thinking about him, thinking about confessing, thinking about the last day that I'll really, possibly see them.

I seriously am gonna miss that smile of his... his voice, calling my name... & just seeing him. 

Damn, how deep did I get myself in this? 😂

Whoot! Skipped school! lol jkay. Went to Franklin for League after dropping off Jo at school. Got to Franklin a lil' late-ish. hehe
In summary, we left pretty late. Vito & Lee got 2nd place for boys' doubles & I got 3rd for girl's singles & made it to sections. 

When the games started & we were waiting, Coach wanted to talk to us. So we stood by the stairs. She was done I guess? and then I was just looking around at them. I caught Lee's eyes and he said "you got my back right?" Of course, after he called my name like always. I just nodded, I mean, I was occupied thinking about the games ahead. 

Eh.. I split my first 2 games which was annoying > > and I just barely beat the Franklin girl I lost to at the last game of the season. I waited for my game w/ Jasmine (from BC) for a long time. Lost to her & had to play the Franklin girl for 2nd & 3rd. I was pretty pissed playing her & I was frustrated w/ my own shots & missing them too. Ended up losing. I was so mad, 2nd set I was hella quiet. Even though they were cheering for me, even Coach said "shake it off" & she usually doesn't. Sorry Mai, 2 unicorns died that day.

Vito & Lee were doing okay. They were playing in the semi-finals I think and Lee popped his racket. HE ACTUALLY POPPED HIS RACKET. I was watching him, and he was looking at his racket, turned around to his court and showed his racket to them. Turned back to look at his racket. And I was watching him. He looked up and we shared eye contact. He came up the stairs, and since my stuff was by the stairs, I picked up my racket and switched rackets w/ him. I'm guessing he's used to my racket since he used it during Stagg tournament. Plus, he said the grip is almost like his own grip (thick). The game ended in a split. He & Vito comes up, and he's like "F*ing piece of sh*" xD Not in a mad way bc he was smiling. We were all watching the game & everyone noticed they don't communicate & they kept flicking. Axl told Lee that they had an option to drop & I said "yeah, stop flicking~" and Axl hella laughed and pointed to me like yup, she said it. xD They went to get their water. And after headed off to their game. I hi-5ed Vito and said communicate. Lee followed afterward. I gave him a hi-5 and said the same thing I said to Vito. His hi-5 was like 2 sec. longer than a regular hi-5, like hi-5 handshake that guys kinda do, except it wasn't like that..? Idunno. And he just chuckled a little and said "thank you." My thoughts were: so formal (thank you) & that was a longer hi-5 than usual. LOL They eventually won their game.
After their game, I had to play the Franklin girl in the loser's bracket, so I took my racket. I think they went to play after me, so when I got back, he and Vito were already playing, & he ended up using Jaime's racket.
I was done w/ my matches by then. I was so sweaty. I changed my shoes, took off my rubber band & my hair had that bump after tying your hair up for so long & tight, I had to loosen it and shake it out. I headed out to the restroom to fix up my hair. I swear, I looked like I just washed my hair. I came out of the restroom & heard them call the boys' doubles match. I knew they were playing next & I heard them walking down the stairs, so I waited at the bottom of the stairs to hi-5 them. I went upstairs to watch them play & then noticed he took my racket xD I didn't even notice when he walked by, and thanks for telling me LOL. Not like I would've really cared haha. And then I saw Jamie was playing so I was like, oh, he just needed a racket. or he just liked mine more haha. I think it was final game? but I don't remember. They lost to BC, and one of their players were hurt. Still, they lost, & got 2nd. Not bad though. They split their final game too. Lee looked like he was trying hard but Vito messed that up. Coach did say Lee would try harder than Vito :p and once Vito's in that mood of his, he's not gonna play as well.

We were hoping to leave but nooo, we gotta wait for the awards. But there was still the boy's singles 1st/2nd place playing. Both from BC & they were taking such long breaks. Axl was like, just hurry up & play and they're both from BC, just take the dang awards. xD bc either way, the plaque goes to BC LOL They're rallies were so long, people were falling asleep.
Anyway, Joyce took some people home first. She asked if I needed a ride to Axl's. At first, I just didn't want dad to drive me back & forth, but then I didn't want to bother them & their riding arrangements so I told them I do. Lee who was listening on turned to me & asked "you're going home?" I looked at him and said no. And then he asked if I was going to Axl's. I said maybe.
We went downstairs for the awards, and we were by the door. I got my award so I went back to the door & stood in the hallway, behind Lee who was standing on the other side of the door (this explanation is probably confusing LOL). Shelly asked if he was going to Axl's & he said probably. Then he went to get his award. Then we all left.

I went home to shower before going to Axl's. I ended up going late I guess? When I got there, Mary/Vito/Lee/Axl went out to buy drinks I guess. I was sitting on the floor next to Mai, who was sitting on a chair. They came maybe 15 min I was there. I leaned back a lil' & saw them come in, then turned back to the TV to "pretend to watch." I think I looked back twice. Heard them ask Lee, "you're leaving?" and he said yeah. Grabbed his stuff & was walking out the door. Axl had that metal "screen" door, and Lee was outside and was about to close the door and he called my name out pretty loud. It kinda surprised me. LOL. It was so sudden I leaned back pretty fast xD and then there was like 2 sec. silence as we looked at each other. I could still just barely see him; he was smiling that smile of his. And then he said "Bye~!" and I think I said bye, or maybe I just waved, or maybe I did both. It was like a special bye bc he only addressed me kekeke okay maybe it's just my lil' girl mind that's thinking too much xD Still :p

The next day, they got choir competition, so they left pretty early. We all ended up leaving Axl's place before 12, but we were watching "Flu," a Korean horror/gruesome movie. Didn't even get to finish it~

I was too lazy to post this week, so I don't remember much. If it was important I'd remember... if there's something w/ Lee, I think I'd remember too :p

So Monday (5/4) we had our team game. I just got out of school, and Jim drove me to the gym. When I got there, Ivy told me who I had to play. Lee saw me & said "I'm counting on you" but I was playing newcomer Lindsey. Uhm, that's hecka evil xD That's 'cause Vito staggered his team, meaning he lined them up not according to their skill :p
After the games, Coach told us that Vito's team won (sucker) & that we still had a chance though. We just had to find all the mistakes in an essay (& I knew it's Vito's LOL). So we did, gave it to Coach. but nothing else. (This other time Coach did a bonding game thingy, was it the same day? I don't remember, but we got in groups & a plate w/ chocolates, & we had to see what flavor it was)
I really don't remember what else...

(5/5) Read Rockstar xD

(5/6) Practice. Afterward, we had a varsity meeting for League in the locker room. She also told them to bring food, extra clothes, & rackets. Lee turned to me & called me & said "You got my back right?" w/ that smile. And I said "I only have 2! My sister took her racket back" lol but I don't know if he heard me say Jim took her racket back. When we left, he was on the phone outside. His dad left him bc we took too long xD So he had to wait for his ride lol.

So today we had practice (& somewhat open gym) at 3. I got there at around 2:45, went inside the gym, saw no nets set up, & saw them sitting outside near the benches so I went out to join them. It was a little awk. hehe. They were playing speed & BS. Axl & Coach were kinda running late :p Well Axl came from inside the campus. Coach was stuck in traffic. Lee didn't get to the gym til exactly 3? lol. JohnJay was calling Axl at this moment on my phone, and then I guess Axl asked who it was & he said me xD.
After he ended his call, Lee asked JohnJay how long they've been waiting & he said since after school. Since Lee didn't have a 4th period, he went home. JohnJay asked where he came from, and, with a straight face & wide eyes, he said "from the trash can." I could not not laugh LOL. He's been bringing that up ever since I messaged him after the Stagg tournament ahahaha. Seeing as Coach & them weren't there, he walked off across the street w/ his stuff to buy himself & Vito some Rockstar. (Coach Lynch came by & fist-bumped me & Vito, who was sitting on the floor in front of me; I was standing. And he said "we got some award winners right here")
He came back, & gave Vito one & had one for himself. Vito asked how much it was. Lee said $5 for one LOL. & that he spent a total of $11 on both of them. Vito said he could've just bought it at Food4Less for cheap. Lee was like "just kidding, 2 for $5" and laughed. Then Vito was like "oh then I don't feel so bad." He gets up bc by now, Axl came by w/ the key. Lee opened his can & drank. He walked by me & asked if I wanted some (I'm pretty sure I wasn't staring at him or anything o.o). I told him I've never tried Rockstar & he kinda gave me a look lol. Don't know what kind of look though lol. Jim & Vito were like "you don't know what it is?" and I'm just like no. He offered again, so I took it. Turned away from them & tried to drink it but then decided to make sure first. So I turned around to Lee & asked "do I just drink from it or waterfall?" and he said waterfall. So I turned around again, trying to waterfall. Couldn't do it xD & I was telling them I can waterfall from a bottle but not a can. Vito was like who can or something like that. So I just attempted to. And I drank like 2 drops (bc waterfalling is too hard lol) and I ended up spilling a bit. xD Got his can sticky hehe ^^' my bad. He didn't mind (well, he didn't show it lol) He just drank it after I gave it back to him. I told them it tasted like soda xD It didn't taste too bad... When we were walking in, he was telling Jim I think that he drank Rockstar at night, & ended up staying up all night. 

Since league is this Friday, we had practice. Nothing much. Doubles practiced w/ Coach & singles were w/ Axl. Drills were okay. I think after our second drill, Mai was serving to me. She looked behind her (where the boys' doubles were training w/ Coach) and then she smiled at me. Well, at least I thought it looked like she was giving me the smile. But no response from me 'cause I really didn't know why she was smiling. lol
At the end we played our "boy versions" lol. so V1 v V1 etc. I had another fun game w/ Adrian :) the 1st set wasn't too bad, but I don't think he was all into it. The 2nd set I think I played bad, like I couldn't run (not like couldn't but yeah).
~~
Skyping w/ Jim & Jen & talking about my blog post about playing doubles w/ him & how we beat Ricky/Tong. I started doubting myself if we had won so I messaged him. They were both on my FB omygahhhh. lol. And then I ended the convo w/ "See U" blue cat sticker (bc all he said was "oh.........okay" lol.) He had gotten off already, but sent me a sleeping Pusheen sticker 40min-ish later xD He still does not seem like a sticker person ahaha >//w\\<

Had a really fun day today ^^ Got up early in the morning to get to McD to meet up with everybody else. When we got there, coincidentally, Lee also just got there. I saw his truck, me & Jim were just getting our stuff out of the car and he called our names and Jim said good morning to him. We followed behind him in. Jim bought food for Jen to bring back to mom. Jeremy was surprised that I wore short shorts for the first time lol. So we got our food. After giving food to Jen to take, Jim had 2 extra McMuffins and she gave one to Axl. She made me ask Lee, but he was like "really? Oh give it to JohnJay or the other guys." and he follows up by asking JohnJay if he still wanted him to buy him food. After I gave the McMuffin to JohnJay, he told Lee no.(Did he reject me bc I "gave" him to Adrian yesterday? xD) Then JohnJay asked him for change. He bought himself iced coffee. We about to leave, but he was still waiting for his coffee. At first I waited w/ Justin for him, then Justin left. Mai came in to throw away some stuff & we waited for JohnJay. Took forever. Everyone was waiting in the van, so we ran to it. Jeremy & Lee were sitting in the back. Justin sat next to the window in the middle row. So Jeremy says someone small needs to sit between them. Mai was already inside, about to sit next to Justin. We look at each other, and then she says "ugh, fine." I think she thought that it would be awkward if I took the seat. So I sat between Justin & JohnJay.

On the ride, they were talking about coffee & tipping cows xD I swore someone said don't put on seat belts so I felt weird that I did. Bc from what I could see, nobody else had seat belts. And when I mentioned that, Jim turned around & looked & said I wasn't the only one, Lee also had his seat belt on. I only saw the belt, since it reaches past the step, but didn't necessarily mean the person had a seat belt on. So I look back to double check & said "oh." We were the only two. (on the ride back, someone said safety first & I think it was him :p) Axl told us that he'd give a dollar to whoever can spot a turkey (as we passed the grassy areas) JohnJay was actually looking LOL. And Jeremy imitated the sound of a turkey SO well we all cracked up. 
We barely got to Independence on time. Mixed doubles was first. So me & Lee went to warm up next to Axl & Jim. Afterwards our games got called. Man, me & Lee could've won that game! TT I did a few good shots; esp. happy w/ my backhand crosscourt hairpins. Even he said "good shot" on them ^^ I felt like I played better w/ him. My shots were pretty good today at least. (Coach was right; we do play better when we are outside of Stockton haha)
I wished it lasted longer... I really liked playing w/ him :3
Jim & Axl split but lost. For consolation... we ended up playing each other. & I messed up big time. I don't even know why TT They went on to play their next game, but lost.
Then we were just waiting for guys' doubles to play. When guys' doubles started, Coach took me, Justin, Jim, & Mai out to Milpitas. We came back after buying some food & drinks from Sweetheart Cafe I think & Quickly. We got back to the gym for girls' doubles, but found out that the guys haven't even played yet.
Lee & JohnJay were playing cards. I was just tired so I slept on the floor. Jim was over there asking Lee to play cards w/ her. (she told me she tried to set it up for me but meh :p) & then they went to eat food. I just kinda watched over the stuff. Jim told me that he eats a LOT. Before we left for Milpitas, he ate a burger. Apparently that wasn't enough bc after they ate the popcorn chicken & whatever else was there, he asked Coach if she had more food bc he was still hungry x'D Poor kid. We were all waiting so we ended up playing DixIt. Me and Jim sat across from Lee, and we were taking selfies & pics of them, & then she ended up taking a pic of him to send to Jen LOL.
I don't remember in what order, but I think we afterward we played "cover the blanket" (chinese game) that's like SlapJack. They were sitting in a circle on the floor, & me and Shelly were sitting on the chairs; I sat behind Lee. Just watching them play was funny. Lee was slow! Kekeke. Afterward they asked if we wanted to play. I really didn't want to play. Shelly would only play if I did, so I did. And then Lee said he was done so we switched spots.

After a long while, Axl & Lee finally played their game. Seeing the opponent, Lee said they were done. They came back after winning the game. And Axl was joking w/ Lee about how he said they were gonna lose; Lee was being defensive saying he didn't say that xD They played their 2nd game I think. We watched. And dayum, their opponent didn't even care about them; they played so nonchalantly, which annoyed me bc it meant they didn't take them very seriously -.- They ended up losing. After the game, at first I thought Axl was mad(?) bc he went out to take a breather. He came back and sat next to me & I thought I'd ask, even though I watched the game: "How was the game?" He said it was pretty good bc it was better than he thought they'd do, but felt bad bc they were targeting Lee. I saw that too... T3T

Then me & Jim played our girls' doubles. We played so bad our first game & ended up playing consolation. I thought Jim was mad after that game. We did better in our consolation games LOL & ended up making it to finals consolation, so we stayed later than expected. There were some good rotations that we did ^^ It just came naturally after a while. Jim numbed her hand a bit -3- I wished we'd taken home something for causing everybody to stay so late. (They were hoping to get home before the Pacquiao vs Mayweather match; apparently Lee betted $500 on Pacquiao. Who knows if that is true LOL)
I took Justin's seat by the window bc I planned to sleep the way back. Jeremy wanted JohnJay to sit in the back w/ them but he didn't want to, til Jeremy threatened to not teach him how to solve the Rubik's cube xD JohnJay complained that it'll be squishy in the back but Jeremy's solution was for him, JohnJay, & Justin to sit in the back, & Lee sit in the middle row. Jim was being such an instigator & she was like "yeah yeah" LOL. Lee just said "F*" hella loud xD And we all laughed. So he sat in the middle row, but mumbled-ish something about Mai sitting in the middle (bt us), I guess so I could sit next to Mai?
I don't remember if this was on both trips back & forth, but Jamie kept singing off-key on purpose LOL. We couldn't stop laughing. On the way to Independence, Rihanna's "Rude Boy" came on & Jeremy was getting everyone to sing I guess? and told Lee to join them. Lee said he didn't even know the song. Jeremy's response was: "you'll know it after this" LOL. On the way back though, they were singing like in harmony (I mean, most of them were in choir LOL.) When Jamie purposely sang off-key though, we'd all laugh again xD
Jim offered us Pocky. I took a small packet (bc they come in small bags). And she was asking the others. Mai got one and also passed back some. Lee took one too (but Jim told me later he didn't say he wanted one 'til she met eye contact w/ him haha) He must've been hungry bc he finished his pack fast. I ended up napping til we got off the highway in Stockton; it's already like 8 something at night.

We were dropping people off and they were wondering who to drop off first, so we dropped off Mai & Justin first, since they live close by. JohnJay kept asking Lee where'd he live so he could be dropped off, but he still didn't want us to know xD but of course he had to give in since Axl was dropping us off. Jeremy was dropped off next. The door was kid-locked, meaning it can only be opened from the outside. Jim had to get out to open the door 3 times. Each time, Lee tried the door. When Axl dropped us off, he was like, "this is where you live?" and I just said yup. I was getting out, but he didn't try to open the door for me >3> & I even said that: "you're not gonna open the door for me?" in a joking/exasperated-ish tone. He said Jim gots it. What he doesn't know was, Jim already unlocked the door when Jeremy got out :p Psh, he tried 3 times to open the door, he couldn't try a 4th time, so I had to reach over him to open the door. Meanie =3=

Finally! Done w/ this long day. xD Jim kept complaining that I didn't interact w/ him :p

There was open gym for people to practice for the tournament. Lee was playing non stop games. Anyway, the whole point, was even though we were supposed to play doubles against Axl/Jim & practice w/ each other, we kept getting pulled into other games & so timing was always off. He was going to play w/ me, but then Adrian was like Lee let's play a game! & then Lee turns to me, starting to say that he was going to play w/ me (or needs to practice w/ me) but I didn't want to deny Adrian his game. He was already whining to Lee: It's just a singles gameeee. lol So I was like "It's okay, you can play your game." And I went off to hit w/ Ivy, of course, after he went to prepare to hit w/ Adrian. He did give me a look that seemed to say he didn't want to, like it was really innocent, kinda like a puppy yearning look >///< *Sorrryyy~*

Afterward, when we can finally play together, we played against Tong & Ricky. At first we tried actual mixed doubles, but I suck at the front. We ended up winning though lol. It was really nerve-wracking > < The main point of not doing actual mixed doubles was bc I suck at front LOL but I also didn't want him running in the back by himself. I'm a singles player, I can handle it.
[Do you see what I mean? Tong & Ricky were way better than the team we played. Ugh. I wish that moment could be replayed...]

Anyway, before his game w/ Adrian he was getting water. Tong had asked to play me, but he didn't have a racket (nor did we have a court) so we were just waiting. Then Lee asked to play? but Nancy asked wasn't I playing w/ Tong. So we asked Tong. He said he wanted to play mixed w/ me. I thought he wanted to play against me, so I was like "but he's my partner *points to Lee*." He was listening too. Then Ricky asked him who's his partner. He points to me & says "she's my partner." Ahahaha that was the funniest exchange of convos xDD Jim said she was on the court listening/laughing to it.

Technically, it wasn't the first time we played mixed before. Before season started, we played mixed together for fun :p

Sometimes I wonder how people see me and what they think of me. It scares me a bit, honestly. I am sure though, that what they think of me, what they think my life is, is a complete misperception. I have always tried to show myself as a carefree person, as someone who wont get bothered because of public judgements. I am sure my friend and family think there is nothing going wrong in my life, that I do not worry enough, that I am always happy. And I am sure they probably somewhat hate me for it because, lets admit it, there is nothing worse than seeing someone whose life seems so perfect while yours is a complete mess. Truth is, I have become an expert at pretending. I think we are all experts or at least we are getting there.

I kept the image on the left bc it was kawaii-ne~ & this above bc I really liked what the creator wrote ^^

February 2008 March 2008 May 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 May 2009 June 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 March 2012 June 2012 July 2012 September 2012 November 2012 September 2013 October 2013 December 2013 April 2014 May 2014 June 2014 August 2014 September 2014 October 2014 November 2014 December 2014 January 2015 February 2015 March 2015 April 2015 May 2015 June 2015 July 2015 August 2015 September 2015 October 2015 November 2015 December 2015 January 2016 February 2016 March 2016 April 2016 May 2016 June 2016 July 2016 August 2016 September 2016 October 2016 November 2016 December 2016 January 2017 February 2017 March 2017 April 2017 May 2017 June 2017 July 2017 August 2017 September 2017 October 2017 November 2017 December 2017 January 2018 February 2018 March 2018 April 2018 May 2018 June 2018 July 2018 August 2018 September 2018 October 2018 November 2018 December 2018 January 2019 February 2019 March 2019 April 2019 June 2019 July 2019 August 2019 September 2019 October 2019 November 2019 December 2019 January 2020 February 2020 March 2020 April 2020 May 2020 June 2020 July 2020 August 2020 September 2020 October 2020 November 2020 December 2020 January 2021 February 2021 March 2021 April 2021 May 2021 June 2021 July 2021 November 2021 December 2021 January 2022 February 2022 April 2022 August 2022 October 2022 December 2022 March 2023 May 2023 September 2023 February 2024 March 2024 June 2024 September 2024 October 2024 December 2024 January 2025 February 2025 June 2025 January 2026 April 2026 August 2026