 konnichiwa~
Hello there & welcome to my blog. Here you'll read tidbits about my daily life, some random thoughts, & maybe a rant here and there. I'm sure you'll learn something about me, if you don't know me of course. Down below are links to find me (personal accounts not posted). I hope you enjoyed your stay while listening to the songs I'm recently listening to. Come back & read again~ ^w^/
find me:
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Stress...?
written on Monday, August 17, 2020 @ 9:45 AM ✈
I thought I had a lot to say, but I kept postponing on blogging that I already don't remember haha. I did start working towards opening my own online store though~ That's been keeping me pretty busy + doing commissions on the side (free for my sisters LOL) There's been a heatwave these past couple of days, and I can't wait for cooler days. Yesterday, there was a crazy dry thunderstorm. At 6am, we got awoken by thunder from a lightning strike, presumably. The loudest thunder I've ever heard. Anyway, my period also came a little late... but it's also not a consistent period, so I was stressing out and getting paranoid. I should be fine though... I need to get back to uploading artwork to my IG and videos to YT. I had a week break since Robin took the week off from work. I have so many ideas/projects I want to work on, but it takes so much time to actually finish something. But I finally pushed myself to work on something (because I've been being lazy and pushing off actually creating the sticker sheet). Test prints today! I have yet to unbox the Cricut... lol
Losing myself...
written on Thursday, July 30, 2020 @ 6:14 PM ✈
Probably more dramatic than need be, but I was in a slump earlier at lunch. For no reason. I just felt very.... gloomy and wanting a good cry.
I did end up crying a bit, but it could've been better lol
Robin was asking me what's wrong, but I don't even know what was wrong. I did tell him I didn't feel like myself, like, "displaced" but that ended up not being the right definition. He kept listing different reasons lol. And one of them was, missing family. I don't assume that's a reason... but it just may be... I may be kind of homesick. I don't know.
Well, that was an odd "identity crisis" that I thought I would never have.
EDIT: I had a "therapy" session with Robin LOL not really, just me finally trying to know why I'm feeling what I'm feeling. Him just saying, don't pressure yourself, go study etc. lol not much help. I guess it really was just an art slump. I like my Lillia drawing but when I couldn't figure out how to draw the hands, it just hit me again how much I don't know how to draw D: I tried coloring Lillia and I didn't like how I going about it. And I just couldn't figure out how I wanted to color her. Later on, I tried to just do some gestures or sketching of some Pinterest photos but all of them made feel like crap (and I didn't even finish them! it was still just the sketch...) I couldn't even do more than 5 gestures. I just felt stiff again. As much as I want to draw more, I can't feeling this way... so studying for real tomorrow? Or just animate. I don't know.
It's a date
written on Saturday, July 25, 2020 @ 8:11 PM ✈
Robin and I spent most of the day outdoors since he didn't want to be in the apartment any longer.
I went in to work really quick this morning, then we took Robin's younger bro to his dentist appointment. We chilled in the car while waiting and went to Manley's Donuts for, well, some donuts. We got half a dozen and the lady was nice enough to give us a random freebie donut lol
For lunch, we went to Yoshinoya in Cupertino, and went to Ume-tea because why not. It took long though since they were making fresh boba. Got a classic milk tea with pearls, but it wasn't as sweet as Happy Lemon's, even with 100% sugar. Johnny was working at Ten-Ren but there was a line, so we didn't go there. Could've redeemed the free drink he gave me! haha We drove to a park and ate in the car. We were expecting a not-so-good lunch because of some low reviews, but the food wasn't bad. The teriyaki sauce tasted... more sour than sweet though. They gave a lot in the plate, and I was already getting full. Good thing we shared instead of ordering two.
The park was wide open green space. There were no trees in the center of the park; it looked like a green plain. We took a walk, then went home for a nap.
After our nap, we went out again. This time to a park near/in Milpitas. The park was huge. It was like, 3 parks connected or something. There were so many families having picnics and just hanging out. Also, saw some people hanging out 6 feet apart and chatting, and a few people playing Pokemon GO lol. We walked a lot but I was already so tired LOL
For dinner we got two jolly hotdogs and a peach mango pie. Yum! Haven't had it in a while, but Robin keeps saying, we have hotdogs. Okay, and? they're not JOLLY hotdogs hmph. I did find a recipe for a at-home jolly hotdog. Maybe I'll try it out some other time. That plus the rest of the donuts, and I'm pretty full.
It was a pretty good day. So tiring though. Also, he makin' me mad at the end of the day.
Well, gonna go shower now because he's saying I'm TYPING TOO LOUD. (Yes, I'm triggered -.- )
Narrowing down the plan...
written on Monday, July 13, 2020 @ 1:05 PM ✈
Is it time to get serious?
Probably.
The time it takes for me to produce any art I can post is too long... and the need to be creating new art is hindering me from working on my animation skills/portfolio. I think I've taken a long enough break. I'm sad I don't have my brain dump journal with me, since I don't feel like writing these in my current sketchbooks (kinda need the pages for sketching out ideas and doing studies lol)
At first I thought I would just journal out my thoughts here... but it's not feeling the same as in writing my brain dump lol I think I'm going to be taking another break from my accounts until I have a backlog of content, for both Instagram and Youtube. I also want to finalize my sticker designs, but it's not something I want to post yet until I can produce proofs.
I have this urge to do so many things, but trying to do a little bit of everything, means I don't have anything finished. So I need to prioritize. I'm also pushing myself to make progress on my tasks because for the time being, I've accepted an offer to work on a short animated series. Details are still unsure but it is highly unlikely I will get paid. At least it will get me to do something more productive, and it's just adding to my resumé and portfolio...
On another note, I still want to do studio vlogs or something like that, so I had Jobee order a goose neck clamp for my phone keke Kind of excited for it~
Nee Sensei, shiranai no?
written on Wednesday, July 8, 2020 @ 9:15 PM ✈
Found another J-drama to watch! Well, it's a mini-series based off a manga with the same name. "Hey Sensei, did you know?" It's really cute, and I haven't watched something super cute and cheesy (LOL) in a while. Watching it on Amazon Prime since Jobee has it.
~
Mm, I guess I've also been productive? I haven't been while at home, but I'm back in SJ now. Doing a lot more creative stuff. Trying to maintain activeness on my art Instagram and getting back into my Youtube as well. I've also started to prepare for my online shop :3
It's something I've always wanted to do. To make the merchandise by hand. To package orders cutely :3 Of course, I still have so many goals I want to do: create my own short film, publish/illustrate a children's book, commissions... But I can only do so much at once. I still can't help but think about all these things at the same time. I am trying to keep myself organized by using my planner, but brain dumping is better for me. I can't do because I left my "bullet journal" at home ~ it's an excuse though haha I can brain dump anywhere :p
*Songs I've been listening to!
happiness by back number (Kobasolo cover)
Natsu-Renbo by Kobasolo ft. Harutya
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Ah. While in the shower, I figured I could use Clip Studio Paint's comic settings to make a "digital" sketchbook kind of thing. While I do think brainstorming with book and pencil is better, it will still get the job done.
I published another Draw This in Your Style video on my Youtube, and actually made a thumbnail that I liked! I might go with this "aesthetic" going forward. Yappari, I prefer pastel colors as my aesthetic hehe. And keeping it cute. Fonts, definitely keep simple.
There's still a lot of fun things I would like to try with the thumbnail, like add strokes around images or handwriting the title. I also want to find an video/editing style that will make my channel/videos... me. Building a brand is definitely going to take a while.
I have been working on my style, but it hasn't been consistent, and I get really disappointed in my art too. Being active on my Instagram has helped a lot, though it's still scary putting yourself out there. I hate selling myself haha but that's how you reach people.
I have been slowly looking for jobs as an animator though. That's also a goal of mine. I want to maintain the animation part of me. During this time, there's not a lot of open positions. Also, bad timing as there aren't any new shows/movies that are in production yet or they are already in the midst of production so they don't need new animators. I want a remote job if possible, or a job that's commutable in SJ. It really limits me, but we'll see though.
A girl & three sweethearts
written on Thursday, June 11, 2020 @ 8:48 PM ✈
Finally finished the series!
So freakin' cuteeee! I love my chef and patisserie~
Ahh.. it's been a while since I've watched something so purely cute keke so shoujo. I love all the passion for their work; makes me want to put in work ^^;
I was also thinking about a one-shot about a patisserie lol
Gonna be busy with work in the coming weeks as our programs start. Well, just until it starts. I guess it eases up afterward.
How the day goes
written on Tuesday, June 9, 2020 @ 11:36 PM ✈
I've been meaning to blog, but I always lose the motivation very fast. And every time I start a post, I suddenly don't know what I want to talk about?
I've only been back at home for 2 weeks, but it feels like forever. I should be spending all my time applying for jobs; full-time job seeker lol but also haven't done much. We did spend a lot of time cooking! Trying out all kinds of recipes, learning new things.
Coming home has made me lazy. Every time. No motivation whatsoever.
And of course, that's no excuse to not be productive, but it just makes it 10x harder to get anything done. I don't know what it is ahaha. I should've kept my school routine more before I became such a potato haha. I haven't posted anything regarding my graduation; it's like I never graduated! The team is working on submitting the film to festivals, though I haven't been much part of it.
So many things have been going on in the world, like, Mother Nature really be back to claim Earth. I haven't really posted anything on my social medias, considering now's really not the right time. I have reposted some resources in regards to the situations around the world... Everything is so crazy, like, I really don't want to deal with it. It's very stressing.
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Was re-reading my old post.
I did finish cleaning within the week! I have so many art books... luckily we were able to declutter the bottom shelf for it.
What's up?
written on Wednesday, May 27, 2020 @ 12:14 AM ✈
I am so. Tired.
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Friday, May 22, 2020 - I graduate with a BFA from SJSU!
Saturday, May 23, 2020 - Robin & I pack up my stuff from my apartment.
Sunday, May 24, 2020 - I move out! I'm back home in Stockton~
Monday, May 25, 2020 - I wake up sore (from moving my stuff LOL) I attempt to clean after I wake up, but I only managed to "prep" cleaning, aka move all the stuff I need to organize into the room & clean what I can in the living room.
Tuesday, May 26, 2020 - I slept at like 4am last night LOL Woke up early enough to cook fried rice, then spent the rest of the day cleaning in the room. Didn't even know how to go about it. At 4:30-6pm, I had a work meeting. After that, I had dinner. After dinner, I'm back at it. Tired. Sleepy. Quite annoyed because everyone is just telling me to "throw away" everything. But why would I do that? 1) that's a waste; 2) more than half of the stuff I own is $$$ "Throw everything away" isn't viable. But I am at fault for my mood. It is most likely because they hit the nail on the head: why do I have so much crap. And it was annoying because people be repeating that to me like I don't know. I know, and? I already own the stuff, what more can I do? I already don't buy as much stuff and trying not to. But since I already own the stuff, I'm like "attached" in a way.
It's kind of like the Marie Kondo way of cleaning: the point of decluttering isn't to just throw everything away; it is to throw away things that "do not spark joy" - to throw away things that do spark joy is the complete opposite of the purpose of decluttering.
On top of that, my dad has been... bothersome as usual. And constantly triggering me. It's so hard to NOT get angry.
Anyway, thinking about all the stuff I own, I know I'd feel better had I not owned them in the first place. However, I am not ready to just completely throw everything out. If stuff could be recycled or donated/sold/re-purposed, I would gladly do so. The idea of perfectly good-conditioned items to be thrown in the trash to fill the garbage dumps does not sit well. And people don't understand why I feel this way, and I get heated.
Currently there is space in the room to walk; when everything was taken out of the bags and boxes in the room earlier, there was barely any floor space to walk through. I was in the zone decluttering after dinner. I don't even know what took up so much space, and where they went now. I've gone through everything that I brought back home from my apartment. There are still some stuff I need to go through from when I moved everything back from my 3-year apartment (biggest move, needed 2 cars) While I do prefer to sell stuff to get some money back lol at some point in life, as I grow older, I would probably donate them just to get rid of them. I imagine my future room to be less cluttered (save for some toys?) and more neutral-toned.
I am trying to finish decluttering within the week (consisting of going through what I brought home -70% done- just need to find some place to store them; whatever else I own in the back room; organizing/cleaning the house etc) so I can finally settle down to find a job and do some more production (art, dance, youtube, etc). I just want to focus on cleaning.
Anywho, time to sleep. I got bites from sitting/sleeping on the floor?
It's only been 2 days since I've been home... but it feels like so much longer ughhh
Also, it's been 90+ degrees...
BFA Presentations
written on Wednesday, May 20, 2020 @ 9:57 PM ✈
Today was quite the busy day. We had our end-of-the-year screening in the morning, lunch break, then hopping onto a 3-hour long BFA thesis presentation. Much tears were shed.
Elizabeth Briggs was my visual principles (ani 50) professor, and she is super adorable, with her obsession of ducks. I loved greeting her in the hallways :D She's retiring and moving away, and on top of that, opening her own ceramics studio (I don't know if she meant for personal or whatnot) but wholesome.
It was amazing to see everyone's finished projects ToT
I'm kinda of drained for words since it was pretty much repeated everywhere by everyone haha but I'm glad my sisters were quite invested in some of them haha
Today was officially the last day of school. I cannot express how much love I have for my program. All the faculty members... the classmates and friends I've made... it's been quite the 5 years in school.
Tomorrow is the BFA dinner. The faculty sent us a gift we are supposed to open together at the dinner, but mine was sent to home :( can't open with them.. but can't wait to get home to it! I'm moving home this Sunday. Friday is officially our commencement day. Time for some boba :3
Our online BFA gallery! https://www.inbetweensjsubfa2020.org/
Home stretch!
written on Monday, May 18, 2020 @ 12:24 PM ✈
We had our final BFA meeting this morning!
It doesn't really feel any different, knowing that I'm graduating in a couple of days... I'm really excited to finish our film though! I feel like... the only thing that's changing is that I am more open to being creative and sharing. If you know me, you know I am very reluctant to share my art online because of, well, fear. There's just so many great artists out there. Also, because most people who follow me on my art IG are from school. They know me. It's embarrassing.
But I'm starting to realize that almost everyone who posts have that fear; that they're not good enough, no one will like it, it's not worth posting. Yet, someone somewhere out there, will enjoy what you make! And if you don't start now, when? So just do it. What's the worst that can happen from posting? I've had nothing but positive comments since I've started to actively post on social media.
So yes, I've been having bursts of creative ideas, usually when I'm about to sleep LOL but also having the urge to want to do something. To want to draw. To want to animate. I want to say, the pressure of school, and to do good, is lifted so I am not... afraid anymore. There's nothing stopping me :)
I want to just purse my "goals" (kind of embarrassing to say, haha)
But pursuing that, also includes my career... and as you all know, my industry is centered in SoCal... which means, if I get a job, I'd have to move there.
I was stressing last night. I told my mom that I'd be coming back to SJ some time in July to move in with Robin. At the end of our call, she sounded kind of mad. Well, she low-key doesn't want me to move in with him probably, for one. And another is, I have to find a job. And my family KNOWS my job ain't up here. I'm sort of a people-pleaser. Sometimes. Decisions are difficult to make. It'd be easier if I didn't have to take into account others' feelings...
I cried last night. Because I was so stressed and frustrated.
But even if Robin doesn't want to me live in SoCal, he also knows that I can't just throw away my career without even trying. He tried to reassure me that even if I ended up moving in with him and have to leave, he can handle the rent...
It does take the financial burden off, but there's still the emotional burden...
I want to believe LDR would work...
Side note, my mom was like: well, even if you don't have a job, you can just live at home.
LOL okay mom xD
Final MONTH
written on Monday, May 11, 2020 @ 10:18 PM ✈
Wowww it's MAYYYYY.
...
Shocking.
Graduating in a few weeks. HNG.
We're almost done with our thesis project! It's coming along so wellll~ We saw a preview of what cuts we have rendered, and... it's so nice!?? I was getting emotional -- I don't know if it's because we're almost done? because it just looks so nice with the lighting/texture/music? because the story is getting to me again? I don't know, but I know I just feel very proud of being able to work with the team I ended up with. I finished lighting and rendering my shots, so I'm working on our thesis presentation video. Wheee more editing in After Effects~
Last week, the Huion tablet Robin got me for graduation also arrived~ Drawing on it was quite satisfying keke.
Ironically to that, yesterday we had a fight on our way to Stockton. It's been months since we had a fight. But we are good. Again. As usual lol
I gotta start applying for jobs again. I have one "contract/freelance" job? in the talks right now. It's only a project for the summer. Other jobs/internships were mostly cancelled due to Covid, but I feel like there's more time to get some different shots in my reel (I have some ideas of what I want to do -- creature, game, action...) and I've been actively uploading to my art channel. I did lag a few times 'cause I just got too busy to edit hehe.
Sleepy
written on Friday, April 24, 2020 @ 9:50 PM ✈
I am so sleepy right now for some reason...
Quarantine got me working non-stop on my laptop so I be staring at these monitors for hours on end. Maybe that's why my eyes are tired...
Today is technically the last day for animating anything for the portfolio half of BFA. Just submitted things for BFA gallery too.
We are finally lighting and rendering for thesis. Hopefully we can be done by May. Oof. We don't really have that much time. I think we actually wanted to finish in April, but of course, animation took longer. And I think we still have 1 or 2 shots that need to be finished animating.
Became a lighter and renderer lolol
Lighting is pretty fun when you get things to work the way you want it too. And if the computer doesn't complain too much about the work LOL
RIP Dr. Lovell
written on Thursday, April 16, 2020 @ 10:57 PM ✈
This week went by fast. And kinda crazy...
We were informed yesterday that Dr. Lovell passed away in his sleep Tuesday night. It's crazy... He even tested negative for COVID-19, but it's possible the test wasn't accurate? Anyway, it was such a shock... I was so lost.. how to feel.. what to feel... It was hard for the team (who worked with him the longest) to process... Arlene was staring into space.. I was trying to find some distraction.. I couldn't help but think about the whole ordeal and ended up crying. He was a jolly guy... as much as he made our job difficult sometimes ^^; he was still a great guy...
It's crazy...
Cooking vlogs
written on Friday, April 10, 2020 @ 2:01 PM ✈
I've been watching a lot of calming vlogs, watching people cook their meals, etc. And I saw this one Youtuber cooking a super simple toast sandwich and another one making a simple fried rice. I've been making sandwiches. They're all right heh.
And today I finally made some fried rice since we had some leftover rice. Made with salad mix, spam, bell pepper, egg, and soy sauce, with oil of course, and some garlic powder (since I don't have garlic LOL). I don't have have any soy sauce or oyster sauce here at Robin's, but we saved the soy sauce packets from Panda Express so I used that. It was surprisingly pretty good!
Took an early shower. My face's been oily... my dandruff's come back. Yikes.
Jen sent care packages with cleaning spray, face masks, and masks xD Gonna reset after this thesis meeting with a face mask~
Also, Pluralsight is offering courses for free this April, so I'll try to cram as many classes as possible LOL
Quarantine week ???
written on Sunday, April 5, 2020 @ 9:35 PM ✈
It rained all day today...
How long as it been? I don't even know but I'm done staying in the room ToT *sigh* when is this over...
But anywho, the past few days, I was able to do some figure drawing practice. Which is good! Because it was never a habit I had. Hopefully, after this quarantine, I'd have better art habits + new skills + improvement!
As I said, it's definitely the time to start new things. I've picked up Blender. I've started to post more on my art Youtube (secret for now, as my content is still bleh) and my art Instagram. Really just trying to break out of my comfort zone and trying to loosen up. I'm always thinking about how "not perfect" something is, but in reality, nothing is perfect. There's no "correct" way of drawing, etc, yet I can't forgive myself for doing it "wrong." But what's right or wrong?
The videos I've posted right now have no audio. I'm not in the best place to be recording audio and stuff. Can't wait to move out~ though I think I'll probably be going back to Stockton for a while... or just move in with Robin. I don't know yet. Am I gonna find a job? I don't know either heh.
Spring break was last week, and it went by so fast. I really did take a break from homework. Probably only did a homework on 2 separate days.
Week 2: Quarantine
written on Monday, March 23, 2020 @ 1:32 PM ✈
Robin and I don't really like cooking at his place, so we worked out this quarantine thing -- without going out to eat -- by going to my place twice a week and cooking enough for 3-4 days. The 1st week, we went out to eat twice, and he tends to be a little lazy in cooking. Plus, he thinks I cook slow. (Well, I mean, I have to prep everything myself and cook everything at the same time. sooo *shrug* I feel like I'm starting to get the hang of balancing everything though.) It'd be so much easier if we had our own place.
I just spent this morning cooking while he worked at my place. That was like 3ish hours? I also made myself some milk tea with pearls, but 1) pearls weren't sweet enough, 2) the tea wasn't strong enough. LOL At least the pearls didn't harden this time.
It rained yesterday afternoon. That was nice.
We also finished "Crash Landing on You" last night, and I cried so much for the last 2 episodes, my heart hurt and I gave myself a headache LOL It's such a good drama~ plus the OST is *chef's kiss*
Well, it's back to work now. I gotta do stuff for SJAWP, but Jane hasn't sent me anything yet, so I can't really do anything :p I'm almost done with my shots for thesis, so hopefully I can finalize them for Tuesday and I can focus on portfolio..
Shelter-in-place update
written on Tuesday, March 17, 2020 @ 11:05 AM ✈
Yesterday, Bay Area counties announced the shelter-in-place. Basically a lockdown.
School instruction moved online. Currently working from home. Robin is also working from home now. I am just at his place. Just did some work, and gonna do some homework now. So hard to live here though LOL because it doesn't feel as clean, in both our perspectives. We usually cook at my place, but so we don't need to drive back and forth everyday, we brought the groceries here so I guess we cooking here until the shelter-in-place lets up and/or the Covid19 recedes and whatnot. Ah, it'd be easier to have our own place ToT (which, surprisingly, my mom was like, that's fine? lol after I graduate, at least)
Trying to manage the new hires from home is difficult. Response is also quite slow. Our work inbox has been... chaotic.
You'd think being stuck home is fun, but when you're told to stay home, you just want to rebel (not talking about me xD) I have so many things I want to do-- could be doing-- but I've only been doing (home)work. I want to do some other art stuff/read but I haven't?
Well, it's not just all work. Robin and I are watching "Crash Landing On You" LOL It's good.
Future plans.
written on Friday, March 6, 2020 @ 12:29 PM ✈
I'm waiting in the Student Involvement center for my thesis meeting. Afterward, I have to go to work until 5. And then~ Robin's taking me to McDonald 'cause I've been craving a shamrock shake~
Davinci Resolve is currently rendering my video. It sure lags my laptop. Not to mention; I really need to clean out my laptop LOL programs & files. I might just take all my files to render on the Alienware PC. Either that, or have it rendering on my laptop but I can't be using it/have other programs open.
You know when the semester gets hectic when my desktop gets full of docs. LOL I kinda cleaned it up by shoving everything in folders, within folders. Bad tactic, but it clears my mind for a while, until I have time to actually go through my files.
--welp. Davinci just crashed on me for a second time. I might just taking all editing/rendering of videos (not on iMovie) to the PC. I'll have to make do with what I've got until I move out of my apartment and have my own "studio" set up.
- Editing/rendering on PC (video files + Maya files)
- "Konmari" my digital files (hard drives, laptop, USBs...)
- "Konmari" my physical stuff (when I move out to somewhere else? & when I can have all my trash in one place with me LOL)
- #toonme #dtiys challenges
- dA Original Character Contest
- Learn Blender (modeling/animation)
- Learn lighting & particles (Maya)
- Keep sketching! from photos, life etc.
- STUDY -- master paintings, other artist styles... etc.
- Own style...
- Character design!
- OC, persona...
- Redo character design from Cameron's class... + story beat.
- Online store!
- Designs > create!
- Cricut, printer
- Supplies...
So many things to do. Wrote them down so they stop bothering me.
Remember my new year resolutions? I do this time. But I haven't looked back at it, which I should.
I voted! and some things.
written on Tuesday, March 3, 2020 @ 9:50 PM ✈
Today was the primary elections, and I voted~ I actually felt pretty good about it heh. Like, a sense of completion lol.
Currently, my apartment is sick. I'm getting warier. I try not to be hope if I can help it.
Jim just got a fever? And even I occasionally cough/sneeze? I don't even know. Stay healthy everyone.
There's so many things going on in my head. I want to start my Youtube channel. I want to open my online store. So many things I want to do. Maybe pick up journaling?
But haaaah, I need to get in to sketching and doing studies and figure drawing. Eep.
Last week was the last Friday with Blue Sky. It's hitting me now, that we are what? two-thirds in to the last semester? There's still so many things to do... still working on my portfolio. Still working on thesis.
Feeling good about my next shot for Green Ninja though :D
Welp, I'm in the middle of my meeting, so back to work~
Life goes on...
written on Tuesday, February 4, 2020 @ 11:03 PM ✈
Recently been selling some stuff on the SJSU app. I'm surprised I got hits haha
Also been craving something to drink a lot, like coffee or milk tea, but I'm trying not to spend ToT
We went to PIXAR last Friday. That was cool.
BFA Animation is also starting our Blue Sky workshop (animators from Blue Sky leading an assignment) so that's gonna be fun 🙃 I feel like I wouldn't be too nervous since I took a workshop with Ted from Dreamworks lol But I probably will.
I've kinda been skipping thesis meeting 'cause I haven't worked on my shot. Big woops. Been kinda working on the merch for SHMcon, which I'm very proud of ✌️
I've also printed my first business card! Even though the design was super simple. Created my first sticker designs (even though they're not mine) and gonna be tabling for the first time! All these first times, but not even for me lol It's a great first time though, without me wasting money LOL can't wait to get my own online store set up wheeee (when?)
Made my new dance cover live this week. Robin's been telling me to start my Youtube channel. I mean, I have already? but I should be consistent. I don't know what the content would be though? I have a general idea; like Laura Price, except as an animator. There are so many animation tutorials, I don't know if I would do those. But anyway, maybe I'll just ease in to a "style."
Oh! and I've updated my website at here~ I really like the look of it; simple etc. Look at my sheep "logo"! I wonder if I can develop it into a brand lol
Website and domain name so $$$. Better be worth it :p
Peace out. Jumped the meeting as soon as it ended LOL yikes.
Lots of work for this week ToT
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Stress...?
written on Monday, August 17, 2020 @ 9:45 AM ✈
I thought I had a lot to say, but I kept postponing on blogging that I already don't remember haha. I did start working towards opening my own online store though~ That's been keeping me pretty busy + doing commissions on the side (free for my sisters LOL) There's been a heatwave these past couple of days, and I can't wait for cooler days. Yesterday, there was a crazy dry thunderstorm. At 6am, we got awoken by thunder from a lightning strike, presumably. The loudest thunder I've ever heard. Anyway, my period also came a little late... but it's also not a consistent period, so I was stressing out and getting paranoid. I should be fine though... I need to get back to uploading artwork to my IG and videos to YT. I had a week break since Robin took the week off from work. I have so many ideas/projects I want to work on, but it takes so much time to actually finish something. But I finally pushed myself to work on something (because I've been being lazy and pushing off actually creating the sticker sheet). Test prints today! I have yet to unbox the Cricut... lol
Losing myself...
written on Thursday, July 30, 2020 @ 6:14 PM ✈
Probably more dramatic than need be, but I was in a slump earlier at lunch. For no reason. I just felt very.... gloomy and wanting a good cry.
I did end up crying a bit, but it could've been better lol
Robin was asking me what's wrong, but I don't even know what was wrong. I did tell him I didn't feel like myself, like, "displaced" but that ended up not being the right definition. He kept listing different reasons lol. And one of them was, missing family. I don't assume that's a reason... but it just may be... I may be kind of homesick. I don't know.
Well, that was an odd "identity crisis" that I thought I would never have.
EDIT: I had a "therapy" session with Robin LOL not really, just me finally trying to know why I'm feeling what I'm feeling. Him just saying, don't pressure yourself, go study etc. lol not much help. I guess it really was just an art slump. I like my Lillia drawing but when I couldn't figure out how to draw the hands, it just hit me again how much I don't know how to draw D: I tried coloring Lillia and I didn't like how I going about it. And I just couldn't figure out how I wanted to color her. Later on, I tried to just do some gestures or sketching of some Pinterest photos but all of them made feel like crap (and I didn't even finish them! it was still just the sketch...) I couldn't even do more than 5 gestures. I just felt stiff again. As much as I want to draw more, I can't feeling this way... so studying for real tomorrow? Or just animate. I don't know.
It's a date
written on Saturday, July 25, 2020 @ 8:11 PM ✈
Robin and I spent most of the day outdoors since he didn't want to be in the apartment any longer.
I went in to work really quick this morning, then we took Robin's younger bro to his dentist appointment. We chilled in the car while waiting and went to Manley's Donuts for, well, some donuts. We got half a dozen and the lady was nice enough to give us a random freebie donut lol
For lunch, we went to Yoshinoya in Cupertino, and went to Ume-tea because why not. It took long though since they were making fresh boba. Got a classic milk tea with pearls, but it wasn't as sweet as Happy Lemon's, even with 100% sugar. Johnny was working at Ten-Ren but there was a line, so we didn't go there. Could've redeemed the free drink he gave me! haha We drove to a park and ate in the car. We were expecting a not-so-good lunch because of some low reviews, but the food wasn't bad. The teriyaki sauce tasted... more sour than sweet though. They gave a lot in the plate, and I was already getting full. Good thing we shared instead of ordering two.
The park was wide open green space. There were no trees in the center of the park; it looked like a green plain. We took a walk, then went home for a nap.
After our nap, we went out again. This time to a park near/in Milpitas. The park was huge. It was like, 3 parks connected or something. There were so many families having picnics and just hanging out. Also, saw some people hanging out 6 feet apart and chatting, and a few people playing Pokemon GO lol. We walked a lot but I was already so tired LOL
For dinner we got two jolly hotdogs and a peach mango pie. Yum! Haven't had it in a while, but Robin keeps saying, we have hotdogs. Okay, and? they're not JOLLY hotdogs hmph. I did find a recipe for a at-home jolly hotdog. Maybe I'll try it out some other time. That plus the rest of the donuts, and I'm pretty full.
It was a pretty good day. So tiring though. Also, he makin' me mad at the end of the day.
Well, gonna go shower now because he's saying I'm TYPING TOO LOUD. (Yes, I'm triggered -.- )
Narrowing down the plan...
written on Monday, July 13, 2020 @ 1:05 PM ✈
Is it time to get serious?
Probably.
The time it takes for me to produce any art I can post is too long... and the need to be creating new art is hindering me from working on my animation skills/portfolio. I think I've taken a long enough break. I'm sad I don't have my brain dump journal with me, since I don't feel like writing these in my current sketchbooks (kinda need the pages for sketching out ideas and doing studies lol)
At first I thought I would just journal out my thoughts here... but it's not feeling the same as in writing my brain dump lol I think I'm going to be taking another break from my accounts until I have a backlog of content, for both Instagram and Youtube. I also want to finalize my sticker designs, but it's not something I want to post yet until I can produce proofs.
I have this urge to do so many things, but trying to do a little bit of everything, means I don't have anything finished. So I need to prioritize. I'm also pushing myself to make progress on my tasks because for the time being, I've accepted an offer to work on a short animated series. Details are still unsure but it is highly unlikely I will get paid. At least it will get me to do something more productive, and it's just adding to my resumé and portfolio...
On another note, I still want to do studio vlogs or something like that, so I had Jobee order a goose neck clamp for my phone keke Kind of excited for it~
Nee Sensei, shiranai no?
written on Wednesday, July 8, 2020 @ 9:15 PM ✈
Found another J-drama to watch! Well, it's a mini-series based off a manga with the same name. "Hey Sensei, did you know?" It's really cute, and I haven't watched something super cute and cheesy (LOL) in a while. Watching it on Amazon Prime since Jobee has it.
~
Mm, I guess I've also been productive? I haven't been while at home, but I'm back in SJ now. Doing a lot more creative stuff. Trying to maintain activeness on my art Instagram and getting back into my Youtube as well. I've also started to prepare for my online shop :3
It's something I've always wanted to do. To make the merchandise by hand. To package orders cutely :3 Of course, I still have so many goals I want to do: create my own short film, publish/illustrate a children's book, commissions... But I can only do so much at once. I still can't help but think about all these things at the same time. I am trying to keep myself organized by using my planner, but brain dumping is better for me. I can't do because I left my "bullet journal" at home ~ it's an excuse though haha I can brain dump anywhere :p
*Songs I've been listening to!
happiness by back number (Kobasolo cover)
Natsu-Renbo by Kobasolo ft. Harutya
--
Ah. While in the shower, I figured I could use Clip Studio Paint's comic settings to make a "digital" sketchbook kind of thing. While I do think brainstorming with book and pencil is better, it will still get the job done.
I published another Draw This in Your Style video on my Youtube, and actually made a thumbnail that I liked! I might go with this "aesthetic" going forward. Yappari, I prefer pastel colors as my aesthetic hehe. And keeping it cute. Fonts, definitely keep simple.
There's still a lot of fun things I would like to try with the thumbnail, like add strokes around images or handwriting the title. I also want to find an video/editing style that will make my channel/videos... me. Building a brand is definitely going to take a while.
I have been working on my style, but it hasn't been consistent, and I get really disappointed in my art too. Being active on my Instagram has helped a lot, though it's still scary putting yourself out there. I hate selling myself haha but that's how you reach people.
I have been slowly looking for jobs as an animator though. That's also a goal of mine. I want to maintain the animation part of me. During this time, there's not a lot of open positions. Also, bad timing as there aren't any new shows/movies that are in production yet or they are already in the midst of production so they don't need new animators. I want a remote job if possible, or a job that's commutable in SJ. It really limits me, but we'll see though.
A girl & three sweethearts
written on Thursday, June 11, 2020 @ 8:48 PM ✈
Finally finished the series!
So freakin' cuteeee! I love my chef and patisserie~
Ahh.. it's been a while since I've watched something so purely cute keke so shoujo. I love all the passion for their work; makes me want to put in work ^^;
I was also thinking about a one-shot about a patisserie lol
Gonna be busy with work in the coming weeks as our programs start. Well, just until it starts. I guess it eases up afterward.
How the day goes
written on Tuesday, June 9, 2020 @ 11:36 PM ✈
I've been meaning to blog, but I always lose the motivation very fast. And every time I start a post, I suddenly don't know what I want to talk about?
I've only been back at home for 2 weeks, but it feels like forever. I should be spending all my time applying for jobs; full-time job seeker lol but also haven't done much. We did spend a lot of time cooking! Trying out all kinds of recipes, learning new things.
Coming home has made me lazy. Every time. No motivation whatsoever.
And of course, that's no excuse to not be productive, but it just makes it 10x harder to get anything done. I don't know what it is ahaha. I should've kept my school routine more before I became such a potato haha. I haven't posted anything regarding my graduation; it's like I never graduated! The team is working on submitting the film to festivals, though I haven't been much part of it.
So many things have been going on in the world, like, Mother Nature really be back to claim Earth. I haven't really posted anything on my social medias, considering now's really not the right time. I have reposted some resources in regards to the situations around the world... Everything is so crazy, like, I really don't want to deal with it. It's very stressing.
--
Was re-reading my old post.
I did finish cleaning within the week! I have so many art books... luckily we were able to declutter the bottom shelf for it.
What's up?
written on Wednesday, May 27, 2020 @ 12:14 AM ✈
I am so. Tired.
--
Friday, May 22, 2020 - I graduate with a BFA from SJSU!
Saturday, May 23, 2020 - Robin & I pack up my stuff from my apartment.
Sunday, May 24, 2020 - I move out! I'm back home in Stockton~
Monday, May 25, 2020 - I wake up sore (from moving my stuff LOL) I attempt to clean after I wake up, but I only managed to "prep" cleaning, aka move all the stuff I need to organize into the room & clean what I can in the living room.
Tuesday, May 26, 2020 - I slept at like 4am last night LOL Woke up early enough to cook fried rice, then spent the rest of the day cleaning in the room. Didn't even know how to go about it. At 4:30-6pm, I had a work meeting. After that, I had dinner. After dinner, I'm back at it. Tired. Sleepy. Quite annoyed because everyone is just telling me to "throw away" everything. But why would I do that? 1) that's a waste; 2) more than half of the stuff I own is $$$ "Throw everything away" isn't viable. But I am at fault for my mood. It is most likely because they hit the nail on the head: why do I have so much crap. And it was annoying because people be repeating that to me like I don't know. I know, and? I already own the stuff, what more can I do? I already don't buy as much stuff and trying not to. But since I already own the stuff, I'm like "attached" in a way.
It's kind of like the Marie Kondo way of cleaning: the point of decluttering isn't to just throw everything away; it is to throw away things that "do not spark joy" - to throw away things that do spark joy is the complete opposite of the purpose of decluttering.
On top of that, my dad has been... bothersome as usual. And constantly triggering me. It's so hard to NOT get angry.
Anyway, thinking about all the stuff I own, I know I'd feel better had I not owned them in the first place. However, I am not ready to just completely throw everything out. If stuff could be recycled or donated/sold/re-purposed, I would gladly do so. The idea of perfectly good-conditioned items to be thrown in the trash to fill the garbage dumps does not sit well. And people don't understand why I feel this way, and I get heated.
Currently there is space in the room to walk; when everything was taken out of the bags and boxes in the room earlier, there was barely any floor space to walk through. I was in the zone decluttering after dinner. I don't even know what took up so much space, and where they went now. I've gone through everything that I brought back home from my apartment. There are still some stuff I need to go through from when I moved everything back from my 3-year apartment (biggest move, needed 2 cars) While I do prefer to sell stuff to get some money back lol at some point in life, as I grow older, I would probably donate them just to get rid of them. I imagine my future room to be less cluttered (save for some toys?) and more neutral-toned.
I am trying to finish decluttering within the week (consisting of going through what I brought home -70% done- just need to find some place to store them; whatever else I own in the back room; organizing/cleaning the house etc) so I can finally settle down to find a job and do some more production (art, dance, youtube, etc). I just want to focus on cleaning.
Anywho, time to sleep. I got bites from sitting/sleeping on the floor?
It's only been 2 days since I've been home... but it feels like so much longer ughhh
Also, it's been 90+ degrees...
BFA Presentations
written on Wednesday, May 20, 2020 @ 9:57 PM ✈
Today was quite the busy day. We had our end-of-the-year screening in the morning, lunch break, then hopping onto a 3-hour long BFA thesis presentation. Much tears were shed.
Elizabeth Briggs was my visual principles (ani 50) professor, and she is super adorable, with her obsession of ducks. I loved greeting her in the hallways :D She's retiring and moving away, and on top of that, opening her own ceramics studio (I don't know if she meant for personal or whatnot) but wholesome.
It was amazing to see everyone's finished projects ToT
I'm kinda of drained for words since it was pretty much repeated everywhere by everyone haha but I'm glad my sisters were quite invested in some of them haha
Today was officially the last day of school. I cannot express how much love I have for my program. All the faculty members... the classmates and friends I've made... it's been quite the 5 years in school.
Tomorrow is the BFA dinner. The faculty sent us a gift we are supposed to open together at the dinner, but mine was sent to home :( can't open with them.. but can't wait to get home to it! I'm moving home this Sunday. Friday is officially our commencement day. Time for some boba :3
Our online BFA gallery! https://www.inbetweensjsubfa2020.org/
Home stretch!
written on Monday, May 18, 2020 @ 12:24 PM ✈
We had our final BFA meeting this morning!
It doesn't really feel any different, knowing that I'm graduating in a couple of days... I'm really excited to finish our film though! I feel like... the only thing that's changing is that I am more open to being creative and sharing. If you know me, you know I am very reluctant to share my art online because of, well, fear. There's just so many great artists out there. Also, because most people who follow me on my art IG are from school. They know me. It's embarrassing.
But I'm starting to realize that almost everyone who posts have that fear; that they're not good enough, no one will like it, it's not worth posting. Yet, someone somewhere out there, will enjoy what you make! And if you don't start now, when? So just do it. What's the worst that can happen from posting? I've had nothing but positive comments since I've started to actively post on social media.
So yes, I've been having bursts of creative ideas, usually when I'm about to sleep LOL but also having the urge to want to do something. To want to draw. To want to animate. I want to say, the pressure of school, and to do good, is lifted so I am not... afraid anymore. There's nothing stopping me :)
I want to just purse my "goals" (kind of embarrassing to say, haha)
But pursuing that, also includes my career... and as you all know, my industry is centered in SoCal... which means, if I get a job, I'd have to move there.
I was stressing last night. I told my mom that I'd be coming back to SJ some time in July to move in with Robin. At the end of our call, she sounded kind of mad. Well, she low-key doesn't want me to move in with him probably, for one. And another is, I have to find a job. And my family KNOWS my job ain't up here. I'm sort of a people-pleaser. Sometimes. Decisions are difficult to make. It'd be easier if I didn't have to take into account others' feelings...
I cried last night. Because I was so stressed and frustrated.
But even if Robin doesn't want to me live in SoCal, he also knows that I can't just throw away my career without even trying. He tried to reassure me that even if I ended up moving in with him and have to leave, he can handle the rent...
It does take the financial burden off, but there's still the emotional burden...
I want to believe LDR would work...
Side note, my mom was like: well, even if you don't have a job, you can just live at home.
LOL okay mom xD
Final MONTH
written on Monday, May 11, 2020 @ 10:18 PM ✈
Wowww it's MAYYYYY.
...
Shocking.
Graduating in a few weeks. HNG.
We're almost done with our thesis project! It's coming along so wellll~ We saw a preview of what cuts we have rendered, and... it's so nice!?? I was getting emotional -- I don't know if it's because we're almost done? because it just looks so nice with the lighting/texture/music? because the story is getting to me again? I don't know, but I know I just feel very proud of being able to work with the team I ended up with. I finished lighting and rendering my shots, so I'm working on our thesis presentation video. Wheee more editing in After Effects~
Last week, the Huion tablet Robin got me for graduation also arrived~ Drawing on it was quite satisfying keke.
Ironically to that, yesterday we had a fight on our way to Stockton. It's been months since we had a fight. But we are good. Again. As usual lol
I gotta start applying for jobs again. I have one "contract/freelance" job? in the talks right now. It's only a project for the summer. Other jobs/internships were mostly cancelled due to Covid, but I feel like there's more time to get some different shots in my reel (I have some ideas of what I want to do -- creature, game, action...) and I've been actively uploading to my art channel. I did lag a few times 'cause I just got too busy to edit hehe.
Sleepy
written on Friday, April 24, 2020 @ 9:50 PM ✈
I am so sleepy right now for some reason...
Quarantine got me working non-stop on my laptop so I be staring at these monitors for hours on end. Maybe that's why my eyes are tired...
Today is technically the last day for animating anything for the portfolio half of BFA. Just submitted things for BFA gallery too.
We are finally lighting and rendering for thesis. Hopefully we can be done by May. Oof. We don't really have that much time. I think we actually wanted to finish in April, but of course, animation took longer. And I think we still have 1 or 2 shots that need to be finished animating.
Became a lighter and renderer lolol
Lighting is pretty fun when you get things to work the way you want it too. And if the computer doesn't complain too much about the work LOL
RIP Dr. Lovell
written on Thursday, April 16, 2020 @ 10:57 PM ✈
This week went by fast. And kinda crazy...
We were informed yesterday that Dr. Lovell passed away in his sleep Tuesday night. It's crazy... He even tested negative for COVID-19, but it's possible the test wasn't accurate? Anyway, it was such a shock... I was so lost.. how to feel.. what to feel... It was hard for the team (who worked with him the longest) to process... Arlene was staring into space.. I was trying to find some distraction.. I couldn't help but think about the whole ordeal and ended up crying. He was a jolly guy... as much as he made our job difficult sometimes ^^; he was still a great guy...
It's crazy...
Cooking vlogs
written on Friday, April 10, 2020 @ 2:01 PM ✈
I've been watching a lot of calming vlogs, watching people cook their meals, etc. And I saw this one Youtuber cooking a super simple toast sandwich and another one making a simple fried rice. I've been making sandwiches. They're all right heh.
And today I finally made some fried rice since we had some leftover rice. Made with salad mix, spam, bell pepper, egg, and soy sauce, with oil of course, and some garlic powder (since I don't have garlic LOL). I don't have have any soy sauce or oyster sauce here at Robin's, but we saved the soy sauce packets from Panda Express so I used that. It was surprisingly pretty good!
Took an early shower. My face's been oily... my dandruff's come back. Yikes.
Jen sent care packages with cleaning spray, face masks, and masks xD Gonna reset after this thesis meeting with a face mask~
Also, Pluralsight is offering courses for free this April, so I'll try to cram as many classes as possible LOL
Quarantine week ???
written on Sunday, April 5, 2020 @ 9:35 PM ✈
It rained all day today...
How long as it been? I don't even know but I'm done staying in the room ToT *sigh* when is this over...
But anywho, the past few days, I was able to do some figure drawing practice. Which is good! Because it was never a habit I had. Hopefully, after this quarantine, I'd have better art habits + new skills + improvement!
As I said, it's definitely the time to start new things. I've picked up Blender. I've started to post more on my art Youtube (secret for now, as my content is still bleh) and my art Instagram. Really just trying to break out of my comfort zone and trying to loosen up. I'm always thinking about how "not perfect" something is, but in reality, nothing is perfect. There's no "correct" way of drawing, etc, yet I can't forgive myself for doing it "wrong." But what's right or wrong?
The videos I've posted right now have no audio. I'm not in the best place to be recording audio and stuff. Can't wait to move out~ though I think I'll probably be going back to Stockton for a while... or just move in with Robin. I don't know yet. Am I gonna find a job? I don't know either heh.
Spring break was last week, and it went by so fast. I really did take a break from homework. Probably only did a homework on 2 separate days.
Week 2: Quarantine
written on Monday, March 23, 2020 @ 1:32 PM ✈
Robin and I don't really like cooking at his place, so we worked out this quarantine thing -- without going out to eat -- by going to my place twice a week and cooking enough for 3-4 days. The 1st week, we went out to eat twice, and he tends to be a little lazy in cooking. Plus, he thinks I cook slow. (Well, I mean, I have to prep everything myself and cook everything at the same time. sooo *shrug* I feel like I'm starting to get the hang of balancing everything though.) It'd be so much easier if we had our own place.
I just spent this morning cooking while he worked at my place. That was like 3ish hours? I also made myself some milk tea with pearls, but 1) pearls weren't sweet enough, 2) the tea wasn't strong enough. LOL At least the pearls didn't harden this time.
It rained yesterday afternoon. That was nice.
We also finished "Crash Landing on You" last night, and I cried so much for the last 2 episodes, my heart hurt and I gave myself a headache LOL It's such a good drama~ plus the OST is *chef's kiss*
Well, it's back to work now. I gotta do stuff for SJAWP, but Jane hasn't sent me anything yet, so I can't really do anything :p I'm almost done with my shots for thesis, so hopefully I can finalize them for Tuesday and I can focus on portfolio..
Shelter-in-place update
written on Tuesday, March 17, 2020 @ 11:05 AM ✈
Yesterday, Bay Area counties announced the shelter-in-place. Basically a lockdown.
School instruction moved online. Currently working from home. Robin is also working from home now. I am just at his place. Just did some work, and gonna do some homework now. So hard to live here though LOL because it doesn't feel as clean, in both our perspectives. We usually cook at my place, but so we don't need to drive back and forth everyday, we brought the groceries here so I guess we cooking here until the shelter-in-place lets up and/or the Covid19 recedes and whatnot. Ah, it'd be easier to have our own place ToT (which, surprisingly, my mom was like, that's fine? lol after I graduate, at least)
Trying to manage the new hires from home is difficult. Response is also quite slow. Our work inbox has been... chaotic.
You'd think being stuck home is fun, but when you're told to stay home, you just want to rebel (not talking about me xD) I have so many things I want to do-- could be doing-- but I've only been doing (home)work. I want to do some other art stuff/read but I haven't?
Well, it's not just all work. Robin and I are watching "Crash Landing On You" LOL It's good.
Future plans.
written on Friday, March 6, 2020 @ 12:29 PM ✈
I'm waiting in the Student Involvement center for my thesis meeting. Afterward, I have to go to work until 5. And then~ Robin's taking me to McDonald 'cause I've been craving a shamrock shake~
Davinci Resolve is currently rendering my video. It sure lags my laptop. Not to mention; I really need to clean out my laptop LOL programs & files. I might just take all my files to render on the Alienware PC. Either that, or have it rendering on my laptop but I can't be using it/have other programs open.
You know when the semester gets hectic when my desktop gets full of docs. LOL I kinda cleaned it up by shoving everything in folders, within folders. Bad tactic, but it clears my mind for a while, until I have time to actually go through my files.
--welp. Davinci just crashed on me for a second time. I might just taking all editing/rendering of videos (not on iMovie) to the PC. I'll have to make do with what I've got until I move out of my apartment and have my own "studio" set up.
- Editing/rendering on PC (video files + Maya files)
- "Konmari" my digital files (hard drives, laptop, USBs...)
- "Konmari" my physical stuff (when I move out to somewhere else? & when I can have all my trash in one place with me LOL)
- #toonme #dtiys challenges
- dA Original Character Contest
- Learn Blender (modeling/animation)
- Learn lighting & particles (Maya)
- Keep sketching! from photos, life etc.
- STUDY -- master paintings, other artist styles... etc.
- Own style...
- Character design!
- OC, persona...
- Redo character design from Cameron's class... + story beat.
- Online store!
- Designs > create!
- Cricut, printer
- Supplies...
So many things to do. Wrote them down so they stop bothering me.
Remember my new year resolutions? I do this time. But I haven't looked back at it, which I should.
I voted! and some things.
written on Tuesday, March 3, 2020 @ 9:50 PM ✈
Today was the primary elections, and I voted~ I actually felt pretty good about it heh. Like, a sense of completion lol.
Currently, my apartment is sick. I'm getting warier. I try not to be hope if I can help it.
Jim just got a fever? And even I occasionally cough/sneeze? I don't even know. Stay healthy everyone.
There's so many things going on in my head. I want to start my Youtube channel. I want to open my online store. So many things I want to do. Maybe pick up journaling?
But haaaah, I need to get in to sketching and doing studies and figure drawing. Eep.
Last week was the last Friday with Blue Sky. It's hitting me now, that we are what? two-thirds in to the last semester? There's still so many things to do... still working on my portfolio. Still working on thesis.
Feeling good about my next shot for Green Ninja though :D
Welp, I'm in the middle of my meeting, so back to work~
Life goes on...
written on Tuesday, February 4, 2020 @ 11:03 PM ✈
Recently been selling some stuff on the SJSU app. I'm surprised I got hits haha
Also been craving something to drink a lot, like coffee or milk tea, but I'm trying not to spend ToT
We went to PIXAR last Friday. That was cool.
BFA Animation is also starting our Blue Sky workshop (animators from Blue Sky leading an assignment) so that's gonna be fun 🙃 I feel like I wouldn't be too nervous since I took a workshop with Ted from Dreamworks lol But I probably will.
I've kinda been skipping thesis meeting 'cause I haven't worked on my shot. Big woops. Been kinda working on the merch for SHMcon, which I'm very proud of ✌️
I've also printed my first business card! Even though the design was super simple. Created my first sticker designs (even though they're not mine) and gonna be tabling for the first time! All these first times, but not even for me lol It's a great first time though, without me wasting money LOL can't wait to get my own online store set up wheeee (when?)
Made my new dance cover live this week. Robin's been telling me to start my Youtube channel. I mean, I have already? but I should be consistent. I don't know what the content would be though? I have a general idea; like Laura Price, except as an animator. There are so many animation tutorials, I don't know if I would do those. But anyway, maybe I'll just ease in to a "style."
Oh! and I've updated my website at here~ I really like the look of it; simple etc. Look at my sheep "logo"! I wonder if I can develop it into a brand lol
Website and domain name so $$$. Better be worth it :p
Peace out. Jumped the meeting as soon as it ended LOL yikes.
Lots of work for this week ToT
|
we live under the same sky
“To put away aimlessness and weakness, and to begin to think with purpose, is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment; who make all conditions serve them, and who think strongly, attempt fearlessly, and accomplish masterfully.”
- James Allen Quotes
Sometimes I wonder how people see me and what they think of me. It scares me a bit, honestly. I am sure though, that what they think of me,
what they think my life is, is a complete misperception. I have always tried to show myself as a carefree person, as someone who wont get bothered
because of public judgements. I am sure my friend and family think there is nothing going wrong in my life, that I do not worry enough, that
I am always happy. And I am sure they probably somewhat hate me for it because, lets admit it, there is nothing worse than seeing someone
whose life seems so perfect while yours is a complete mess. Truth is, I have become an expert at pretending. I think we are all experts
or at least we are getting there.
I kept the image on the left bc it was kawaii-ne~ & this above bc I really liked what the creator wrote ^^
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: afeeqah azhar, 19 march, malaysian .
: hidenobu suzuki, + follow
